i am at present trying to get over the loss of 2 unborn children one happened last year. i was very ill and lucky to have come through the loss of my baby  and 2 illness and very bad depression. 

i am now disabled  and have to walk with crutches i was told we would never have another child only find out that we where expecting another baby.

sadly we lost the child and are sad that we have lost 2 children.

this has shaken me and my faith and most days i do not know how to get through the day.

it is make me really question my faith and what is going to happen next. 

i have been a failure and keep on failing.

i do not think i will ever be happy again. 

i used to be happy really out going and loved life there is only so much a person can  take and think its time for me to bow out as i feel my soul has been total shattered and my heart broken.