Thanks for the friendship request. Hope all is well with you.

Thanks for welcoming me as a friend here!
I enjoyed your journal post about mysticism and sobriety. I too have spent much of my life deeply and feelingly inspecting/exploring those funny wrinkles in the oneness, contradictions with intuition, in other words, s--- that just doesn't seem to fit, or where my soul cries out "What is this?" As hard as those places are I relish them and the opportunity to have been on the inside at all, feeling my way through the darkness, but becoming familiar with unspoken reality directly. Power is a huge and fascinating aspect of many of these troublesome aspects of life, as you mention. The "powerless" thing is a bit of an oversimplification, as you imply. I think the point is that our logical thinking "me, myself, and I" monologue is at least almost powerless in the sense that no matter how much we can talk sobriety or any other intention, we can find ourselves suddenly jumping in to the very thing we thought we were trying to avoid with both feet. And it's like "Oh, no, not this s--- again!" So the powerlessness is perhaps more the acknowledgement that we are LIMITED minds within a great all encompassing wholeness that is one vast UNLIMITED consciousness, which veins off into each one of us. As long as we remain conscious that there really is no part of ourselves that is any way truly separate from anything else, then we can keep an edge on that ridiculous "me, myself, and I" dialogue, and keep a feeling of true power in the "surrender" of our thinking mind as we welcome the help of the "higher power" which is really just Ourself (whichever vein of the whole we may be). Anyways, sorry to jumble, but the point is, I empathize with the struggle, and appreciate the humility of saying, "I get it, I get it, but there's still this thing that keeps bugging me." We are all parts of the same whole researching this vast thing that is Ourself. Happy to be in touch with others here living this work and play.
Peace,
Ty