etsryan
More About Me
My Tagline:
I am listening. Are you?
My Interests:
Prayer, Meditation, Worship, God, Angels, Afterlife, Interfaith issues, Charity, Origin of life debates, Biblical archaeology, History, Movies, Music, Books, Education, Travel, Gardening, Crafts, Current events, Politics, Art, Environment, Holistic living, Yoga, Health, Depression, Recovery, Cancer, Weight loss, Sports, Fitness, Cooking, Caregiving, Money, Dating, Pets, Dreams, writing, creative conversations
My Favorite Books, Authors, Musicians, Movies, Preachers, TV shows, etc:
The Bible, Fr. Jim Livingston, Fr. Robert Altier, Fr. Leon Klymczyk, I'm on an Amy Winehouse kick lately (i like just about any kind of music), Paul Potts, Metallica, God's Politics/Jim Wallis, Tavis Smiley, Anderson Cooper, news, The View, 60 Minutes, GMA, Deal or No Deal, Elastic Waist/Daily Special, "The Passion of the Christ", "Fly Away Home" http://youtube.com/watch?v=FXUR0-_azSU
Who Inspires Me:
God - Father, Son & Holy Spirit, Blessed Mother Mary, saints, the poor, missionaries, people who help others, those who lay down their lives for others, people who pray and confront evil with holiness/peace/love, journalists who dig/care, Fr. Goose, folks who help animals and the planet, astronomers, scientists, artists
My organizations and affiliations:
archspm.org, cathedralsaintpaul.org, Basilica of St. Mary mary.org , St. Lawrence-Newman paulist.org/spirit/minneapolis.htm bustedhalo.com, Catholic Charismatic Renewal mncro.org ccc.garg.com/ccc/index.html nsc-chariscenter.org, World Apostolate of Our Lady of Fatima fatimaonline.org wafusa.org, American Chesterton Society chesterton.org, National Catholic Bioethics Center ncbcenter.org, befrienderministry.org, ProLife Action Ministries plam.org, lovelines.org, feministsforlife.org
My favorite spiritual activities:
Holy Mass, Holy Rosary, Divine Mercy devotions, Eucharistic Adoration, charismatic prayer groups, healing prayers/Masses, 1st Friday all night Fatima vigils of reparation, conferences/retreats, silence/breathing, truth telling, practicing humility, standing up for truth/oppressed, reaching out, discussing issues/ideas, watching nature & people
Who I'm praying for:
everybody everywhere
What is your current spiritual mood?:
Needy
What's your spiritual type?:
Old-Fashioned Seeker - I'm happy with my religion but searching for right expression of it.
About Me
I joined Beliefnet in 2002/2003 while taking classes - trying to improve a tenuous situation. I was on the abortion discussion board for the most part back then. I like consistent life ethic stuff. I like discussing news and issues of the day. I like to get feedback and others' ideas/views about things and make sure I am not overlooking important facts/facets and share things that others may be overlooking/undervaluing. I think we all have blind spots and the more eyes/hearts on a subject/idea, usually the better the understanding is. I make - or try to make - an effort to find ways/bridges to build consensus - a worthy goal to strive for imhho - in as many things/areas as possible for better unity in the community. This does not mean I am not opinionated - I do make strong stands on what I believe in.
"Sink or swim you gotta give it a whirl - life's a dance you learn as you go. Sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow - don't worry 'bout what you don't know..." (John Michael Montgomery tune)
"When you get the choice to sit it out or dance...(I hope you) dance!" (Lee Ann Womack tune)
I used to work as a radio DJ years ago - back in the day when there were hardly any women on the air.
Lately I have been living an impoverished existence financially, but relying on spiritual treasures to gain insight from circumstances and stay grounded in spite of trials. Looking for my place(s) to fit, be of use/service. Feeling marginalized at times. I have had chronic pain/fatigue since 1990 - fibromyalgia, C3 injury in 1989 (freak car accident). Dealing with emotional and other issues since sexual assault/humiliations in the 70s/80s and absent/disappeared father during part of my childhood.
Seems that survival issues are taking precedence over deeper/higher things? This bothers me. Not getting any younger and I am not sure if any of the things I feel are unfulfilled/unresolved will ever be or make sense. I get the feeling I have to make certain things priorities or they will get pushed to the side by day to day operations of sorts. How to do this though is a puzzle. Sometimes it feels like hanging on to a board in raging flood waters trying to stay afloat while chaos ensues all around with folks on higher ground in houses waving at me, wishing me well (?) as I careen about in the deep. They seem to be happy that I am hurting/in trouble. Can this be? Apathy? Malice? Say it isn't so. This is more serious than I thought. I thought I was the one in trouble, but I am just stuck in this sea of motion. Seems they are stuck in the ghastly muck of compassion deficit.
Found out my IQ tests high even though the discombobulated situation I find myself in doesn't lend itself to that being obvious. Also, this contributes to marginalization even though it is considered a gift since the majority of folks aren't in this 'brainy club' and some sense some kind of difference in me and seem to resent it or think I am trying to be "Miss Know It All" or something like that when I am just trying to be myself. Not sure whether it is more of a burden or a blessing at this point. Finding 'like minded' folks is tough. Figuring out how to use what I have for good is complicated, too, it seems. Less than ideal education doesn't help. I sometimes think being an older single female complicates this even more. The physical pain I have doesn't show either. I guess I'm more than meets the eye in some ways. I get misjudged frequently. Maybe someday my true colors will shine bright enough and folks will see the real me and have no doubts. Right now I feel like I am in some kind of holding pattern of sorts/in some ways. Am I on a plane with a parachute on my back? Is the door open? Am I supposed to jump? Tandem? Was I supposed to get some instruction before coming up here? Geronimo?
Sometimes I think about playing Texas Hold 'Em for a living. Winning a big lotto jackpot would do, too. Finding some funds to "work" with.
My Basics
Gender: Female
Occupation: intercessor
Relationship Status: Single
Faiths:
Catholic
Faith Description: Catholic, Charismatic, Christian, Church-going, Evangelical, God-fearing, Moral, Religious, Scientific, Seeking, Sinful, Spiritual, Zealous, sacred text, Angels, Community, God, Heaven, Hell, Jesus Christ, Power of Love, Prayer, Science, The Bible, The Golden Rule, Christian, Evangelical, Pentecostal, Roman Catholic, baptism of the Holy Spirit, Holy Spirit fruits and gifts
etsryan's Journal
what have i lost that i wish i had
Posted: Jun 28, 2008 2:54 AM
My virginity/innocence, high school years/education opportunities, m y dad, younger adult years, stamina, slimness, grandparents,... (more)
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your sig - June 29, 2008 - 09:21 AM
There never was a Jesus (which you cannot even say) other than in looseleafs, in which he clearly said he came not to bring pax but a sword. As you are a sexual assault victim, you should see http://community.beliefnet.com/forums/showthread.php?p=590089 for pages on biblical sex practices, as well as my link on topix for Skeptic's Annotated Bible (by my profile's linkhead) with God-sanctioned sexual and other atrocities, as well as see Robert S.'s questions on Yahoo! Answers on the mistreatment of women as the lone blameful adulterator.