Staying focused at work can be hard on a normal day. But today is slightly left of normal. I'm out of meds, and I haven't made it to CVS yet. Why not? Not the usual reason (laziness)--I'm sick. Yes, I have to admit it, I'm definitely sick. And just in time for the biggest fucking ski week of the year. Perfect. At least I only have to stay awake for six more hours....unless I decide to have a life tomorrow. Then, who knows?
Driving to work tonight, thick mist hung in the air. My headlights, rather than showing me the way, obscured the road. Beautiful. Perfect.
Tonight, the wheel turns to Imbolc, feast of Lady Brigid. Spring begins. Seeds begin to sprout. As the snow continues to fall during the coming weeks, we remember that, deep below the ground, new life has already begun.
At work, life feels more mundane. I sent someone to the ER a few hours ago. Richard, in the other room, keeps talking. I appreciate his efforts, but I'd rather have the silence. I go into light trance very easily--like when writing the previous paragraph. Work can pass for alone time, if I'm in the right mood. Though I feel I am constantly seeking love and companionship, I can definitely be a loner sometimes.
Just read the Beliefnet article on the spirituality of Superbowl Sunday. I like it. At the party I'm going to, I will undoubtedly be the only one who sees it this way--and yet, I still dedicate my revelry to the G-ds. Our ancestors spent days celebrating with food, drink, and athletic competition. Are we really so different?
Well, here I go. I haven't written in an online journal since....well, since the day my Grandma died. That was three years ago. It feels good, though. Having this place-not-a-place to turn to. Maybe it will last, maybe it won't. But here it is.