Hi, i wish to have the right words and answers for what you are going through, maybe you solved it already, im new here but when i read your message i knew i had to say something. it's been a lesson for me that when im with my face on the floor, everything looks dark and i cant find a way out, having someone to talk to and knowing that person understands without judging you, makes a big difference. The problems still there but there is a little bit of calm, hope, faith, that everything is going to be ok. A shoulder to cry on is a blesssing not everybody has. God bless you my friend