Yes that is actually my Thanksgiving "Tom" Turkey from 2008! :-) I do love to celebrate and this is a little tradition passed down to me by my Dad's Mom, Anna Kalis. We never sat down to Thanksgiving dinner without the bird being "dressed" with buttons down his chest (cranberries on toothpicks) and wax paper booties on his feet. I have no idea where she got the idea from but as you can see it has stuck with ME! While most people laugh pretty hard at this tradition, it does make a rather pretty picture, don't ya think? :-)

Any one who knows me a bit knows how much I love to celebrate anything and everything, but especially the holidays! On Thanksgiving, my hubby and I usually don some type of "pilgrim" attire to remember our founding fathers the pilgrims who thanked the Lord with a feast after losing many loved ones on the voyage here aboard the Mayflower and then throughout the hard cold winter. In spite of their grief and hardships they celebrated.

Are you going to celebrate this year or are you going to mourn? Holidays are joyful and fun for some but for many holidays are dreaded and painful and emphatically punctuate their sorrows. How can we celebrate when our heart is broken and we've experienced brokenness in a precious relationship - or when our hearts are grief stricken over loss of a loved one - or a tragic diagnosis has just been handed out. How do we celebrate when "happy family time" just points out to our own hearts that we are alone and broken and struggling? How do we celebrate when family is fractured and relationships are strained maybe even abusive? The joy on the one hand augments and emphasizes the pain on the other?

Always we have a choice of how to deal with the holidays. We can choose to run away and avoid all the pain. We can choose to drown ourselves in some diversion. We can put on a "mask" and pretend away that we are not hurting. We can make everyone else uncomfortable with our sullenness and silence. I would like to suggest to you, there may be a better way.

First we must acknowledge and own our own pain. Why do family times make me so unhappy, uncomfortable? It is ok and even healthy to identify the wound. It is ok to say this hurts. Talk to someone you can trust about your pain. If you've lost a loved one in the last year, each one is grieving in their own way. There is comfort in shared grief. Most importantly take your wounds to Jesus. Jesus is trustworthy with any ugly wound you are trying to cover up. He is the GREAT PHYSICIAN. He is actually the only one who can heal your heart. Jesus wants to heal your heart more than you want it healed yourself. Wounds do not heal under wraps they need to be cleaned and exposed to the air. Invite Jesus into your pain, He will dress the wound, ask Him to heal the wound. It will take time - while wounds heal, pain is ongoing, but the pain from a wound that is in the process of healing is bearable.

Family is so important in our lives. We need our families. Our families need us. The greatest gift we bring each is other is ourselves. Yes we are all imperfect and struggling with life - but we are still here and still able to provide comfort and laughter and "home" for one another. So often we are tempted to look at others in our families and think if I were only like them - they have it all together - most of the time that is not even true - they have their own heartaches and struggles just like we do. Home and family is where we need to share our hearts. Now I know you cannot trust everyone with your heart - but I want to suggest to you to find at least one safe family member and take a little time to address your concerns and issues with the holiday stuff! Put a plan in place. If Uncle Joe bugs the life out of you when he starts his rants, create an out for yourself. Take a walk, help in the kitchen, play with the kids - they grow so quickly, sit and listen to grandma or grandpa, they may not be there next year. Actually, we never know when it might be the last opportunity to all be together as family. Life has no guarantees.

There's a little saying, "If you'll think, you'll thank." Stop and think of happy memories you share with your siblings, parents, aunts, uncles, grand parents, etc. No one else loves us, knows us, gets us, and yes maybe annoys us, like our own family! Joy is a choice and its up to us to choose it. We can choose to go on as "poor me victims", "blame mongers", "woe is me", absent ourselves, or we can choose to focus on the blessings. I'm not suggesting we deny our pain but rather that we face it. Face it, embrace it, release it. You will enjoy your family and they will enjoy you. If you knew it was the last time you'd ever be able to celebrate together, your words would be tender and gentle, you'd listen carefully and intently to one another, you'd laugh heartily at family humor and you'd come away comforted rather than depressed and oppressed.

I pray that no matter what is going on in your heart and life, you will celebrate a Joy filled Thanksgiving. I know the pain of celebrating after brokenness and loss of loved ones. I've allowed Jesus to heal my wounds and I've chosen JOY. You can too. If you are hurting and would like to talk with me further, or have questions, please email me at joy@joy-bringer-ministries.org .

When I was a girl Thanksgiving looked like this:
Mom got up early put the turkey in the oven
We all got up and dressed for church
Thanksgiving Service was a big deal - well attended - anyone who came was permitted to share whatever they were thankful for (we had to participate too) - no preaching - special music.
Then home for a feast with relatives and friends and oh joy it was not a Sunday so we could play and when we were older even watch some TV!
Grand mom Kalis dressed the turkey before we sat down to eat it. :-)
At the table we had place cards with our names on them and Bible verses my Mom had written out by hand that had the word Thanksgiving or thanks in it, which we all had to read aloud and then say what we were most thankful for. Someone prayed a long prayer before we ate.
Unfortunately it was all ruined by the heaps of dishes to wash up and put away!

Today Thanksgiving looks like this:
I get up and put the turkey in the oven
We watch the Macy's Day Parade, of course!
Then I cook a lot more food than we can eat
There are a lot less relatives to cook for - many are already in heaven.
We still take a turn and thank the Lord for our many blessings.
We sit and talk a lot longer than when we were kids.
We all help clean up.
Hubby watches football.
I like to end the day by watching "Miracle on 34th Street"
Mom and Gerda go off to Chinese retreat.
Alfred and I go down to Lancaster to meet up with more family on Friday.

Psalms 89:15: "Blessed are the people that know the joyful sound: they shall walk, O Lord, in the light of thy countenance." Whatever or however you do it, CHOOSE JOY and have a truly Happy Thanksgiving!

Joyfully yours,
Ruth Joy
joy@joy-bringer-ministries.org

We went to dinner tonight with my brother and sister-in-law. What a time we had just conversing about life and things we've been through. It was comforting, uplifting, healing and just plain enjoyable! Have you ever noticed, God just has this amazing way of connecting the dots for us? You know, you struggle through days that are filled with sameness or sometimes madness, or heartache and grief - you know God has ways of working things out - yet it all seems like a bunch of disjointed dots on a page. Then one day out of seemingly nowhere, God just draws a line from one point to the other like one of those "connect the dots" pictures and we get a little glimpse of the truth that HE IS GOD - and He actually does know what He is doing in my life - and He cares, very much! We suddenly realize He is actually working on a bigger picture that we cannot see fully yet but are realizing they are not just random dots without meaning!

Well, that's our God! You may have guessed - tonight HE connected some dots for me! :-) Truth be told, if we really stop and think about our lives, God is about a lot more than meets the eye. He is at work in all of our lives doing things that are not humanly possible at so many levels. The hard part is hanging in there while the dots are totally unconnected. That brings us to TRUST! The life long lesson we are ever learning! God was always looking for the Israelites out in the wilderness to learn that lesson. HE was GOD! He was trustworthy! They didn't get it. I want to get it! I hope you do too.

There is so much tumbling about in my heart and mind - but it'll have to be for another time and blog. If you happen to find yourself in one of those disjointed places - don't lose heart - don't give up - keep trusting God and HIS love and plan - one of these days you too will start to see those dots getting connected!

joy@joy-bringer-ministires.org

Jesus disciples saw that when Jesus spent time in prayer He received heaven's answers. They saw the importance He placed on getting alone with His Father and so one day they asked Him, Lord teach us to pray.

Jesus said, when you pray.... and then He gave them a pattern to follow which most of us know as "The Lord's Prayer". Sadly The Lord's prayer has been used as a nursery rhyme to soothe us into a religious feeling.

Jesus said, when you pray say, "Our Father which art in heaven, hallowed be your name. Notice where Jesus wanted them/us to start. OUR FATHER who is in heaven. Our heavenly Father who is holy, separate, awesome to be reverenced and honored and adored. Have you listened to yourself pray recently? Now I know prayer is simply conversation with God - but God is not a God of random disorder - anything kind of goes kind of God. Just look at the excruciating lengths of order and precision that the Israelites went through to set up worship to God in the wilderness tabernacle. God cared about the tiniest details down to the spoons, garments to be worn, how many pegs in the boards, etc. etc. - Clearly we see there a God that is VERY attentive to details. So when Jesus teaches His disciples about prayer He instructs them to begin with focus on the Heavenly Father. Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be THY name. Thy Kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is done in heaven. Notice up to this point not one thing is mentioned about our needs.

When I listen to people pray, I am astounded! If I did not know better I would think they were writing a letter to Santa Claus or maybe a "to do list for Superman. God is neither one of those - He is not just waiting for our "wish list" and then one morning magically going to deliver it all in our living room with bows and shiny paper because we wanted it. Nor is God going to jump when we say jump to zap all the people in our lives into line as we perceive that to be. God is interested in relationship with us. He loves us extravagantly and has already given us the most lavish gift imaginable - the life of His only begotten Son. When we approach Him, He does expect reverence and our focus is to be on Him and His Kingdom. God needs us on this earth to accomplish HIS will and His purpose and that only can happen by our having the heartbeat we see here in this prayer ... THY KINGDOM COME - THY WILL BE DONE... here in my life, in our world, in my community, in my family, in the lives of all those He has placed around us, those hurting and grieving and suffering. That is where our praying needs to START.

I'll continue this thought tomorrow.

My fortune cookie tonight said I was to write my life events in a journal :-) I'm not sure I've added any life events but I am at least journaling.

joy@joy-bringer-ministries.org

I have to balance what I've written about listening for God to speak to us and having a hearing ear with this. There are well meaning people running about saying they hear from God for themselves and do not need God's Word or any one else. That is error. I too have seen people use God for exuses to do all sorts of things that are not Godly at all, or are simply just what they want to do. God is not a fool and will not be mocked. I do believe we can hear God in our daily lives as I have already posted, but do not support the abuse of that concept! When God speaks to our hearts it will always line up with Word which is the FIRST place we should hear from Him anyway. Secondly, people who tell others that God gave them a message for someone else - well again - God is not a gossip or a fool. I believe there are many today that call themselves prophets that just deal in "familiar spirits" and it has nothing to do with GOD! When we know God's Word and are in relationship with the Good Shepherd we learn to "know His voice" and cannot be easily led astray or fooled.

www.joy-bringer-ministries.org

"Speak, Lord, your servant is listening." 1 Samuel 3:9

Those words were what Eli the priest told the boy Samuel to say when God was attempting to speak with him. God had stopped speaking to Eli due to his failure to discipline his sons. It's a serious thought - Can our disobedience to God stop up our ears? Hearing requires action.

Listening is an art. A long time ago I heard someone teach about "listening" for God's voice. They encouraged us to imagine ourselves as large receivers ready and waiting to pick up any communication that might come through the air waves. You know the receivers I mean - sometimes you see a huge one on someone's lawn or out here in the country on the top of a hill - strategically placed to make receiving signals possible as well as prolific! So maybe we need to place ourselves strategically too in a state of readiness to receive whatever message God would like to communicate to us.

We live in a world that is full of more sound than perhaps ever before - from channels to tweeting, ipods to blackberries,  the sounds are endless. How in the world are we going to be able to tune in to hear God's voice through all that competition? It takes some training, time and attentiveness for sure as Samuel learned. It also required his willing heart. "Speak, Lord, your servant is listening."

Have you ever been speaking with someone and midway they start looking across the room at someone else and focusing on another conversation and you realize they are no longer listening to you? I'm afraid I've been guilty of that myself. It does not help the conversation! We all have that basic human need to be HEARD. Many times Jesus said, "he who has ears to hear let him hear" ... Jesus wanted to be heard!  Now I'm not just talking about hearing "audio" sound either. Jesus wanted people to hear him with their hearts in such a way that it would affect their daily living.

We do not need multitudes of people to hear us - matter of fact if we have one person who really listens to us and hears our heart it is usually enough. Not so with God, He actually wants ALL of us to really HEAR Him and get His heart and allow it to transform our daily living. Wow! When I believe that it makes me want to say along with Samuel, "Speak, Lord, your servant is listening."  I remember as a child on the way home from church my Mom would ask us to tell her what we had heard in the sermon that day. It was easy for us to remember the humorous parts but she was not satisfied with that - she was trying to train us to listen to what was actually being said as young as we were. I am thankful for that training today and can still remember many things I've heard in sermons throughout the years.

You've heard a Mom tell her child "now you need to listen to me" she does not just mean "hear my audible voice" she means DO THIS NOW! God has spoken to us through His Word very clearly and HE want us to hear it in such a way that we will stop everything and DO what we have heard from His word NOW! Do I have an "ear to hear" what God is saying to me today? It is the most important message in the universe. He has literally moved heaven and earth to rescue us from eternal death and give us instead eternal life. It's a message of extravagant love that never changes and never ends. It requires our attention and demands our response. It requires daily obedience to live in a way that shouts to those around us that God is alive in us. It will move us to love those around us as HE loves! A tall order but possible because of Calvary! May our hearts always bow in "speak, Lord, for your servant is listening."

Joyfully,

Ruth Joy

www.joy-bringer-ministries.org