I did a lot of thinking about depression this morning, while I was writing in my paper journal. Seems to me that an awful lot of America is bi-polar lately, or, in my own case, claiming to be at least borderline bi-polar. And, if we're not bi-polar, we are uni-polar, functional depressive, non-functional depressive, dysthemic, and I'm sure there are more names that I'm not aware of. Where did all this depression...and titles...come from? I'm 60+ years old, and it seems that it's only in the past 15-20 years that this has happened. What has happened to us, as a society, not as individuals, to cause all this depression and unhappiness?
Growing up in a calmer time, back in the 50's, and even during the "hippie" 60's, the "me" 70's, and the whatever 80's, I don't recall folks claiming to have all this mental anguish. No. There were, of course, crazy/insane people back then, even back in the 1800's there were asylums for those people, but I'm not talking about those folks, I'm simply talking about depressives. We're not crazy, but we definitely have problems. Here on beliefnet.com there are at least two depression groups that I'm aware of, the depression support discussion board, and the Beyond Blue group(what's the difference between the discussion board and the group? I have no clue....), and I think there are other support groups for depressives in other places on the net, as well as in real life. There are more people that are depressed, those that don't post on boards, enjoy support groups, just don't talk about their depression, as well as those of us here at b'net, so there are literally thousands and thousands of depressives in our society today. Why? What has caused this pandemic of depression?
I'm sure that all the modern technology we've been exposed to has much to do with it, not to mention DNA/genetics, also. Our air, at least here in the metro Atlanta area, isn't fit to breathe during the summer months, to the point that our media tells us "red alert/orange alert/brown alert...stay in the house...stay in the house...stay in the house," many times. Scary, eh? Our water can't be drunk(drank? drinked?)without a lot of scary sounding chemicals being put in it. Our food supplies are loaded with antibiotics, preservatives, steroids, and who knows what else? All of these modern technological advances may have done something to our natural brain chemicals, causing the imbalances that cause the depression. The very things that have been invented to keep us alive and "healthy" are now ganging up on us and, if not actually killing us, they are at the very least destroying our brains. Reminds me of a book I read years ago, don't remember the name now, but the whole society caught a "stupid" disease, one that caused people to regress in intelligence until they were no more than infants. Is this now a possibility? Another scary thought, eh? What are we allowing "them" to do to us in the name of advancement, I wonder? How are all these advances affecting us? What can we do about it?
In my case, I'm going to start taking yet one more chemical into my body, to offset the "rollercoaster" that I've been riding for years now. I admit it, I need some help to simply maintain a level ride, I'm tired of the highs and the lows, the Black Hole, and then the upward soar to Heaven...back down again...up again...ad nauseum.
Anyway. I dunno what else to do. I do the "right" things for myself: I maintain a fairly rigid routine, I burn pretty candles, I use pretty lights, I listen to music I like, and I try to eat a decent, well-balanced diet, as free of chemicals and preservatives as possible. Sadly, those chemicals and preservatives make some of the junk food I love, and I can't seem to stop eating them. Sigh. I try, not to successfully, I admit, to stay away from sugar, and goodness knows, I love my cookies and candy. But I'm doing better with the sugar...right now...and ever since Old Man left, my groceries are more and more either frozen or fresh, with very little canned and over-processed.
And after doing all those things, as well as adding a chromium supplement, I'm not in the Black Hole right now. Thank You, Father! I don't neglect the spiritual aspect of my life, either, btw, because I think that's very important to my recovery here, and always have thought so. I've also made a radical change in my work schedule, having moved from the afternoon shift to the morning shift, which has put me back into the "normal" sleeping pattern of us humans, as well as boosted my financial situation a lot. So, after five months in the Hole, I'm out of it, and I want to stay out of it, so, I'm going to go ahead and fill the prescription for Zoloft, in hopes that I can maintain this good life I'm living now.
Now if I would just give up caffeine and nicotine....371d36d75e05eda735858f8e467be99c