a glimpse in our office.

It used to be a happy office of different nationality from indians, africans, lebanese, egyptians and filipino's.  Way back when the clock ticks 1 p.m everyone was happilly singing and rushing to the pantry, though we have a small one , we are comfortable seeing each other eating and conversing on anything under the sun. We used to laugh and laugh out really loud even the CEO could hear our laughter. Those were the days...........

Seeing it now, you can see those sad look in the eyes of each and everyone, those hidden cry that wanting to escape from those tough guys and gals within the 4 corners of this warehouse.  Recently one of the bussiness unit of this group was dissolved leaving 8 guys wondering where to go next, they were not prepared, they didn't see it coming. They have families to feed, rents to pay, cards to pay and everything. Where would they go after this.  I really dont have any idea.  Those thoughts alone kept me awake for nights and thinking and thinking and thinking...........

I keep on wondering how the people manage to go on with their lives knowing any moment from now everything will be gone.  I know everything has its reason and that we should keep on surviving.

I'm an avid facebooker, and believe it or not those people who have lost their jobs were always updated in different games, applications, quizzes in FB. I dont know why but maybe this stuffs make their life funny or light or happy.  I, myself felt gratified whenever i move one level to another in Farm town or have customized my own farm and pets. Or have answered a quiz of we dont know where it came from and how they have come up with those answers.

Its so ironic how simple stuffs make someone feels alive even if it seems that he/she carries the whole world in him/her. Though everything seems dark, we should always find time to laugh and dont indulge oneself on thinking how, when and why instead live it one day at a time and simplify life, because

Life is simple, we should'nt make it complicated as the old saying says ...SIMPLIFY. SIMPLIFY AND SIMPLIFY.

This is the first time i'm going to write to you, i know i was not able to speak my mind to you when i was on vacation last month.

You raised me well, i owe everything to you. And i just want to thank you for everything.

You teach me how to behave, how to be strong and how to be a good person when everybody was bad, how to control my temper when i was uncontrollable, how to keep my silence when silence was needed, how to help other even if we also needed help, how to dream and dream and fly and reach for your dreams, how to hide this loneliness so that everybody won't worry, how to brush my hair, how to go to places, how to go to school, how to cook, how to walk, how to talk, how to read, how to think and most importantly how to love unconditionally when we all know they're wrong.

I remember the days when we used to go to pangasinan, and you always choose me to accompany you because you love me and i'm your favorite daughter , my sister was actually envious of me then and i also remember that i told you i would only come if my sister would come as well, but due to some financial problem you can only carry one of us. You chose me and i thank you for that, we played a lot, you teach me the places we passed by, you carry me to your lap and proudly says to your father and mother and brothers of your beautiful  daughter (thought i'm not) you tell them how good i was and you just dont know how proud i was when you were telling that. I miss the day  when i am busy watching television at night and you'll sit there drink your beer then talk to me and well talk about anything, about your life as a child of how proud you are to your father, of all the sufferings you have encountered when you were young of the simple jokes you would like to share to me, of the other jeepney drivers problems that they were telling you as well, of how you and nanay met, of how you struggle to let your brother go to school and you opted to stay with your parents to help them in farming, of how you wanted your father's life be written in a book, hat i wanted to syour my mentor, your intelligent, you gave me the power to think, write and say way. One day your dream will be fullfilled and i wll do it by myself, i dont know how but  i will try my very best to do it.  I was always amazed by every word that you say because i know it came down from your heart and mind and though it doesn't make sense to me before, now i understand , i understand everything tatay.

I hope i can bring those days back again. i really miss you tatay. i hope we can sit again someday one to one while im watching tv and you sitting there drinking your beer. i love you and i miss you so much ,im the kind of daughter who dont  say this to you but i hope you can hear me say it , even if i just say "kamusta ka" . i hope you can read between the lines that what i really want to say is that i miss you and i love you and i want to hug you and kiss you.

I know i still have time,  i am away but my heart is with you , with all of you in our family, I may be in Dubai physically but i am always thinking of you and the laughters and the sadness and the joyous conversation we had.

I will be go home again next year. And we'll have a long vacation, we'll go to a place where we never been to, all the family and friends. We''ll have fun and fun and fun.

What i am right now is because of you,  i love you.

Thank you, thank you, thank you my dear tatay and i love you, someday i will let you read this.

sincerely,

your daughter - joanne