Watering Relationships
So this is
probably one of the most profound insights I think I have had in a while.
To explain, a story about
plants.
When you have a plant you must
water the plant, give the plant sunlight, make sure it has good soil, make sure
the pot is big enough, etc.
If you want to keep the
plant (alive) then you have to do these specific things.
If you don't do
what the plant needs, the plant leaves (dies).
People are the same way,
only we all "need" different things.
Some people need:
- To be told how much
they are loved - Touched
- Gifts Bought for them
- Time Spent with them
- A feeling of being
wanted - A feeling of being
loved - To be needed
- Not to be needed
- Freedom to do what they
want - To have everything
planned for them - To go out and do
things together - To stay in and do
nothing together
And the catch is, if you
don't water each person in their unique way they want to be watered,
that person will leave.
So if you have kids, find
out how they need to be watered, and water them that way. They will be smarter,
happier, and listen more often.
If you have a spouse,
find out how your spouse likes to be watered and water them in that way. They
will be happier, easier to get a long with, less arguments, and do more for you
as well.
If you have friends or
other family members - find out how they like to be watered and water
them frequently and often in that way.
If you have a boss, co-workers
or employees, find out how they like to be watered and water them in that way.
How do you find out how
everyone likes to be watered?
Ask them.
You could ask them
possible things like:
- How do you know you
are loved? When someone does X or you feel X, then you know you are loved.
- What is the one thing
you would not want to live without from me? Touch, me saying I love you, me
doing things for you?
Or whatever else you want
to ask to find out how they want your attention (or don't)
I found this on line somewhere but it is pertinent.
Be gentle with yourself and as Gandi said: "Be the change you want to see in others" and I add the world around you will change.