Post Reply
Page 1 of 4  •  1 2 3 4 Next
Switch to Forum Live View Should everyone reproduce?
5 years ago  ::  Dec 04, 2008 - 12:00AM #1
Sailorlal79
Posts: 1,365
Question- do you feel that some people should not reproduce? (This is not meant to entertain ideas of forced sterilization and such, merely whether people should voluntarily not breed).
If you have a health condition, or a mental illness, etc?
Do you feel that there are some traits that should not be passed on to the next generation?

I've gotten somewhat curious about this because I want to have a baby in a couple years, but I have multiple sclerosis, anxiety and depression- maybe these are things I shouldn't pass on. (Although the MS is usually not directly passed to descendents, it may affect my ability to parent well.) Thoughts?
Quick Reply
Cancel
5 years ago  ::  Dec 04, 2008 - 6:21AM #2
Tmarie64
Posts: 5,277
The odds are just as likely that you WON'T pass anything on.
My sister had a lot of problems, none came from our parents or their families.  They all started, and ended, with her.  Her kids are both productive and successful individuals.
Don't let your fear stop you.  I think you'd be on helluva parent.
That being said... I don't think anyone should let a "maybe" stop them from being a parent.  I know people who should not be allowed to have kids... but they are a whole nother thread.
James Thurber - "It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers."
Quick Reply
Cancel
5 years ago  ::  Dec 04, 2008 - 11:06AM #3
Sailorlal79
Posts: 1,365
you guys are very kind, thank you!

To be honest, most of the people who shouldn't reproduce probably never consider whether they should anyway- so maybe its a moot point:D
Quick Reply
Cancel
5 years ago  ::  Dec 04, 2008 - 2:26PM #4
Tmarie64
Posts: 5,277
Exactly!  The ones who shouldn't usually end up with a litter of kids.
The ones who worry about being a good parent before they're even pregnant are the ones who are good, usually.
James Thurber - "It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers."
Quick Reply
Cancel
5 years ago  ::  Dec 05, 2008 - 7:33PM #5
JonAtFaithUCC
Posts: 294
[QUOTE=Sailorlal79;934518]Should everyone reproduce?[/QUOTE]

No, I don't believe so.
Quick Reply
Cancel
5 years ago  ::  Dec 05, 2008 - 10:40PM #6
ManzanitaBear
Posts: 946
If everyone with anxiety and depression didn't reproduce, the human race would soon become extinct!  Anxiety and depression, even to the point of real illness, are so common.  And probably becoming more and more so.

If you've spent much time on hormonal birth control, there's a strong possibility of that causing anxiety or depression or both.  I don't know if that's true for you, and of course you don't have to say--but the ways we achieve not reproducing may cause those very problems!

As for multiple sclerosis, if it wouldn't make pregnancy dangerous for you (I have no idea if MS does that, but I understand hormone levels affect its severity?) and if you have adequate support in your life for taking care of the kid if it disables you more, why not have a child?  Blind people have children.  Deaf people have children.  Paraplegics have children.  Their disabilities don't make them bad parents.  They may need help, but even completely able bodied people can't do it all on their own.  It takes a village.
Quick Reply
Cancel
5 years ago  ::  Dec 06, 2008 - 7:15PM #7
Sailorlal79
Posts: 1,365
Oddly, pregnancy is healthy for people with MS. Your immune system attacks itself less when you're pregos. Of course, once you give birth, you are likely to have a relapse (in my case, probably lose my vision in one eye again).
Quick Reply
Cancel
5 years ago  ::  Dec 08, 2008 - 12:16PM #8
appy20
Posts: 10,165
I don't believe that anyone ever has the right to say or impose that decision on anyone else but I do think that part of being a responsible person means asking oneself that question.  For me the answer is no. My last boyfriend and I were planning to marry and the subject of children came up.  It was horrible for me because I do not want my genes passed on.  My boyfriend also has some awful genes. He wanted a child.  I compromised and agreed to have one. I loved him too much to deny him that.  But. It was wrong and I am glad we broke up over other reasons and I never had a child.

I think the question is would you want another to suffer the repercussions from your genes.  Contrary to what another poster said, just because your immediate offspring do not have your traits, doesn't mean that no one will.  Rest assured, your genes are perpetuated and someone down the line WILL get your genes and disorders. 

I have multiple genes that I would not want passed on.  Three of my four grandparents had asthma. I was a severe asthmatic as a child.  I was hospitalized 17 times.  I was sickly the rest of the time.  I didn't weight 40 lbs until the sixth grade.  I would not wish that on my worst enemy.

I outgrew the asthma at 13.  I also developed mental depression at 13.  Also, a lot of hormonal imbalances.  My adolescence was a fog of severe depression resulting in two suicide attempts and hospitalizations. I would not wish that on my worst enemy. 

Also, I had a violent father and a mother with a severe personality disorder.  I would not wish that on my worst enemy. 


Last and least.  I am not physically attractive.  This is not a world that is forgiving of female physical imperfections.  I do not consider this a main reason to not have children though because it has not hurt my life in any substantial way. In some ways, it has been a benefit.  I learned things that I would not have learned any other way.   It has certainly caused me a lot less pain than the asthma or mental issues.  However, I would not wish to pass it on to an innocent life (although, it may be enlightening to some).

I have come out on the other side of both of my disorders.  Although, I have made a pact with myself that should I ever develop asthma again, I have to consider suicide.  I can't do that again.  My mental issues are considerably better.  Occasionally, I need a mild antidepressant but I do not fear losing my sanity.  My sanity is just fine. 

I love life.  I love my job, my home, my friends and pets.  It all worked out.  But.  It was too hard.  I just could not put anyone else through that.

I think that is the bottom line.  Would you put your child through the hardship?  Could you watch them go through it as you or your family did?  Those are the questions I believe that everyone should ask themselves.
Quick Reply
Cancel
5 years ago  ::  Dec 08, 2008 - 12:53PM #9
appy20
Posts: 10,165
Oh another thing.  The post that claims that traits are only passed on 25% of the time is a total crock.  Some traits are very dominant with a 75% or higher chance of manifesting. My boyfriend's family has a very severe dementia that all the males get and half of the women get.  The dementia is more severe and has an earlier onset than Alzheimer's. 

Alcoholism is one trait that has a very high probability being passed on. Even if the child is removed from the alcoholic parent at birth. Studies on twins separated at birth validate this.  Some disorders frequently skip one generation but consistently show up in subsequent generations.

There are some disorders that will never disappear from the human race until those that have them stop passing them on.
Quick Reply
Cancel
5 years ago  ::  Dec 08, 2008 - 1:57PM #10
ManzanitaBear
Posts: 946
Fact is, you don't necessarily know what genes you're passing on--good as well as bad.

As far as I know, no one in my family had asthma before my generation, although my dad had severe pollen allergies even as a child.  My sister and I both had asthma as children.  I outgrew it.  She's still susceptible, though it's not as severe as it was.  The other child in the family, my brother, has never wheezed in his life.

There does seem to be plenty of history of depression and anxiety problems in my extended as well as my immediate family--but it's talked about little enough that it's hard to track.  Who knows if it's nature or nurture, genes, or other factors, or all of those.
Quick Reply
Cancel
Page 1 of 4  •  1 2 3 4 Next
 
    Viewing this thread :: 0 registered and 1 guest
    No registered users viewing
    Advertisement

    Beliefnet On Facebook