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9 years ago  ::  Jan 06, 2009 - 4:00PM #1
Posts: 1
Hello, im new to this forum, my name is Sarah.

My Mother passed away several weeks ago after a 4 yr fight with Cancer.  I have not felt her presence and really thought I would have by now as I felt my Husband around me soon after his death.

I don’t have contact with guides or the spirit world as such, but was wondering,  is there is a way to ensure my Mum is safe and crossed over?  If someone was very sick can it take longer for them to cross over or require healing once they get there?

Any insight would be appreciated.
Thank you
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9 years ago  ::  Jan 11, 2009 - 11:05PM #2
Posts: 2,949
I felt my dad the next day after he was killed in a farm accident. it was sudden and stark. He was here and then he was gone. The next day I woke up to hearing him chuckling.  He had the most delightful chuckle. I knew at that moment he was alright. I had a thought that he was telling jokes to God. The next thought was I hoped they weren't terribly naughty. I don't hear my dad so much. Haven't for years. I expect he is somewhere fishing. He is there but well, he is busy. I know he's there but he was a very outgoing and dynamic man. He had a lot of friends and a whale of a lot of family. We are a pretty big bunch. So he really is busy. He loves me and I feel that. When I get there we'll have a grand old time.

When my mom passed on with cancer we had spoken about it and she told me that if she could she would tell me she was alright.

I waited and I waited. She didn't and I was very upset. Then one night I found myself standing bolt upright in the center of the floor of my bedroom. I went from sleeping in bed to standing in the center of the room. I was confused and the house was quiet. Then I heard my mother call my name. Just my name. Nothing else.

Over the years, my mother has been gone these last sixteen, I have heard her voice. It is usually in the evening when it's quiet and still. It is nothing more than my name. It is her voice. It is comforting.

Mom was not as outgoing as Dad. She was shy in many ways. I think she has many friends too. I think mom is the quieter woman now as she was in this life. She didn't talk as much but she always listened.

I knew whe was alright. She had lung cancer and her death was painful. I think she had some healing to do. I cannot know this for certain but I do think so. Dad's death was sudden and very unexpected. He was a hearty, hale man. Mom was very ill and in considerable pain.

Again I cannot tell you with certainty. But I can assure you that ai believe this with all my heart.
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9 years ago  ::  Feb 01, 2009 - 12:53PM #3
Posts: 81
In my experience, usually those who have chronic conditions pass more quickly and quietly than those who go unexpectedly. Often the sudden departures don't always realize they have gone and so it may take a bit of time for them, just to be sure.

My mum died from a chronic condition. She did come back from time to time but it was several months and then years. Now, I know she is on her way onto her next whatever she needs to be doing.

My Da went unexpectedly and had to be coached through spiritual action to really get it. He was in a coma and was expected to come out of it, but didn't. His spirit hung out for a while but when the reality was made clear to him, he was more OK with it. I have not experienced his presence since.

I would say, don't worry but get through more of your grief. Often our strong emotions can keep us from sensing the presence of the departed if they are indeed there with us. And don't be surprised if you do sense her. Just accept and enjoy. And also remember our bodies need about a year for the grief cycle to complete from the death of a partner or a very close relation. Give yourself the time.
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9 years ago  ::  Apr 29, 2009 - 5:38PM #4
Posts: 715

Jan 6, 2009 -- 4:00PM, Sarah_NZ wrote:

Hello, im new to this forum, my name is Sarah.  My Mother passed away several weeks ago after a 4 yr fight with Cancer.  I have not felt her presence and really thought I would have by now as I felt my Husband around me soon after his death.  I don’t have contact with guides or the spirit world as such, but was wondering,  is there is a way to ensure my Mum is safe and crossed over?  If someone was very sick can it take longer for them to cross over or require healing once they get there?  Any insight would be appreciated. Thank you


You can be 100% sure your Mom is safe and well. There are two issues here, which may have been confused by the previous poster. Expecting death is certainly a blessing, as that is when folks get to see who will meet them, and thus the passing over is typically achieved without problems. But a long term chronic illness, drains the spirit as well as the body, and it is almost certain your mother will be in a spirit hospital, gaining strength. But all will be just fine.

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9 years ago  ::  Nov 04, 2009 - 10:31PM #5
Posts: 231

My mom passed on Thursday, Oct 29, 2009 from complications due to the massive stroke she had in May of this year.  Most of her life she had been very ill and in so much pain...the worst was when the stroke hit, 2 more happened after the first within 3 days.  It was very difficult to watch such a proud, incredible woman and mother fade into someone I could barely recognize.

I thought that with my being an empath along with my other gifts that I would feel her when she went like I have done with all of my other family members who passed but I didn't and I think that is what hurt the most.  We were so close, I am the baby of my family and the closest to her, not just because I took care of her but because we were also best friends. Yet, I couldn't feel HER.

I pray that it is because she is healing in Heaven now with my grandparents and relatives and I pray that when she is done she will come to me and let me know she is ok.

Yet, my heart wonders why this is so, why I could feel everyone else but not her...the one whom has always meant the most to me in my life besides my children and grandfather.  Have I lost my gift to connect due to my grief or am I just trying to hard to reach her or am I right and all she needs to do is heal?

I miss her so much already and it has only been 6 days....


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9 years ago  ::  Nov 20, 2009 - 9:16AM #6
Posts: 20



I hope that you have been able to "take a deep breath", and, if not, I suggest that you do so.

It is one of the strange wonders that many psychics, including John Edward, report being unable to sense or contact the person they were closest to when that person passes over.

To some degree, I think this may be due, in fact, to the closeness of that bond, which would simply become too invasive, and the person on this side too dependent upon the level and type of contact which would now be available. Another reason may be that it would be difficult for the individual to distinguish 'real' perception versus wishful thinking or 'imagined' perception regarding someone to whom they are so close. (It's easy to "know' that the spirits you don't want around are wouldn't imagine them being there, and would probably prefer to imagine them away if you could. Not so for someone like mom.)

John points out that even those who deal with contacting those who have passed over need time to grieve for the change, the loss of physical contact, that is a part of having a loved one cross over. It is not easy to hear, but it will not be any different for you, and I hope knowing that helps you to accept that your grief is real, healthy, and OK.

I have a feeling that, as time passes and the urgency you feel to 'need' contact from her, or percpetion of her begins to fade a bit, she will be in a better position to reach you, though you will likely still find the nature and extent of your relationship changed




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8 years ago  ::  Nov 24, 2009 - 3:15AM #7
Posts: 231

Thank you for your kind words....Even though I know we change the human part does want that bond back...yet you are right in what you say.  I must grieve first then be open to her spirit and yes lol, I try not to think of all the "others" around me.  I have always been able to sense spirits yet chose not to communicate, it is pretty scary actually.  I don't usually "see" them just get messages from time to time and that is enough for me. 

Yet, because we were so close I thought it would be like when my other relatives passed, that I would sense them and know...with mum I didn't get anything and it bothered me because she had dementia so I'm not certain she found her way. But I will wait and grieve and hopefully make some sort of connection with her someday:)

Thank you for reaching out to me

Luv & light


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8 years ago  ::  Feb 03, 2010 - 11:15PM #8
Posts: 4

Hi Dreamie, I just returned today from a long journey. I see you've been through life changes as well. Here's a big warm hug. (((Dreamie)))  Have you received small signs yet that make you chuckle? If not you are still grieving. (I'm sorry)

The news I get is to be open to indignant feelings that lead to giggles, she's near and she wants to tease you into a smile. I keep seeing you losing an earring that she's loosened? Like she's swiping at your ear and saying "Just Listen!" I think she won't do it though... until you are ready. Honor your time of mourning but look for the sunrise.

xxx Wren

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