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5 years ago  ::  Mar 06, 2009 - 12:17PM #21
Tmarie64
Posts: 5,277

Yeah, they took the "easy" route.  Grease the wheels with money.  Don't work to get the "flawed" American child.


 


Now... Why are the pro-lifers here not responding on the thread "Pro-Life wtihout exception"?


http://community.beliefnet.com/go/thread/view/43971/13929287/Pro_Life_without_exception


 


A 9 year old Brazilian girl, raped and impregnated by her step-father...  Read the story, the please, try to justify the pro-life without exception policy.

James Thurber - "It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers."
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5 years ago  ::  Mar 06, 2009 - 12:31PM #22
Lonesentinel
Posts: 2,423

Mar 6, 2009 -- 12:17PM, Tmarie64 wrote:


Yeah, they took the "easy" route.  Grease the wheels with money.  Don't work to get the "flawed" American child.


 


Now... Why are the pro-lifers here not responding on the thread "Pro-Life wtihout exception"?


http://community.beliefnet.com/go/thread/view/43971/13929287/Pro_Life_without_exception


 


A 9 year old Brazilian girl, raped and impregnated by her step-father...  Read the story, the please, try to justify the pro-life without exception policy.




Who says all American children up for adoption are 'flawed'?  And why should anyone who would adopt a child have to accept a 'flawed' child?  Being willing to adopt a child at all shows character - a person who is willing to sacrifice for the betterment of mankind (assuming that they are adopting in the right frame of mind).  How can you truly degrade them?  Adopting any needing child shows this and should be praised.  Those who would adopt a special needs child (physical, mental, or emotional) are even more special because their willingness to accept the challenges that they will have, but to degrade any adoptive parent who goes about the process in a lawful manner with the right frame of mind, internationally or nationally, is wrong IMHO.  Mankind is mankind, no matter where they are born...

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5 years ago  ::  Mar 06, 2009 - 12:45PM #23
Tolerant Sis
Posts: 4,201

Mar 6, 2009 -- 12:31PM, Lonesentinel wrote:


Mar 6, 2009 -- 12:17PM, Tmarie64 wrote:


Yeah, they took the "easy" route.  Grease the wheels with money.  Don't work to get the "flawed" American child.


 


Now... Why are the pro-lifers here not responding on the thread "Pro-Life wtihout exception"?


http://community.beliefnet.com/go/thread/view/43971/13929287/Pro_Life_without_exception


 


A 9 year old Brazilian girl, raped and impregnated by her step-father...  Read the story, the please, try to justify the pro-life without exception policy.




Who says all American children up for adoption are 'flawed'?  And why should anyone who would adopt a child have to accept a 'flawed' child?  Being willing to adopt a child at all shows character - a person who is willing to sacrifice for the betterment of mankind (assuming that they are adopting in the right frame of mind).  How can you truly degrade them?  Adopting any needing child shows this and should be praised.  Those who would adopt a special needs child (physical, mental, or emotional) are even more special because their willingness to accept the challenges that they will have, but to degrade any adoptive parent who goes about the process in a lawful manner with the right frame of mind, internationally or nationally, is wrong IMHO.  Mankind is mankind, no matter where they are born...




 


Any child who has spent any time in Social Services has deep emotional, and sometimes physical and mental challenges.  By the time a child is released for adoption, he or she may have had numerous foster parents, several attempts at 'reunification', and been left with serious trust issues, in addition to whatever pain or abandonment he suffered at the hands of a birth parent who should never have given birth to him.


There are over a hundred thousand kids waiting for a permanent home, most of them non-white, non-infant, and already defeated.


Forcing a woman to give birth unwillingly creates, in many cases, just another tortured little being.  Our refusal to pay for abortions as part of a comprehensive national family planning policy has already caused these poor things to exist, and there aren't homes for them waiting with open arms and hearts.


Before 1973, there were orphanages where babies were tossed into cribs and left without human contact for hours on end.  They created generations of children who couldn't attach and love, and we are reaping the rewards of that failed policy now in high divorce rates, child abuse rates, and spousal abuse rates.


People who want to parent children for the right reasons will look to older children within foster care systems first.  It's hard, and they can make you crazy ... but it is the most rewarding thing you will ever do.


Save the born and breathing FIRST.

First amendment fan since 1793.
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5 years ago  ::  Mar 06, 2009 - 1:28PM #24
Lonesentinel
Posts: 2,423

Mar 6, 2009 -- 12:45PM, Tolerant Sis wrote:


People who want to parent children for the right reasons will look to older children within foster care systems first.  It's hard, and they can make you crazy ... but it is the most rewarding thing you will ever do.




I think this statement is unfair.  Most parents I know also enjoy experiencing all the wonderful things that go along with having a newborn or close to newborn...their first steps, their first words, all of those 'first' experiences.  Are they wrong to want to experience that with the child that they adopt?  Are they horrible humans if they shy away from adopting a damaged child when they could adopt one they see as having less problems?  You have pointed out yourself that the longer a child stays in the 'system' the worse that child is off because of it.  I feel that those who adopt at all are blessings to our society, not just the ones who take on more troubled children than the newborn.

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5 years ago  ::  Mar 06, 2009 - 2:06PM #25
Tolerant Sis
Posts: 4,201

Mar 6, 2009 -- 1:28PM, Lonesentinel wrote:


Mar 6, 2009 -- 12:45PM, Tolerant Sis wrote:


People who want to parent children for the right reasons will look to older children within foster care systems first.  It's hard, and they can make you crazy ... but it is the most rewarding thing you will ever do.




I think this statement is unfair.  Most parents I know also enjoy experiencing all the wonderful things that go along with having a newborn or close to newborn...their first steps, their first words, all of those 'first' experiences.  Are they wrong to want to experience that with the child that they adopt?  Are they horrible humans if they shy away from adopting a damaged child when they could adopt one they see as having less problems?  You have pointed out yourself that the longer a child stays in the 'system' the worse that child is off because of it.  I feel that those who adopt at all are blessings to our society, not just the ones who take on more troubled children than the newborn.




 


I welcome all adoptive parents, but the truth of the matter is that there are no guarantees with any child.  I am currently fostering a newborn who is drug exposed.  I took the child home because I recently adopted his 12 year old sister, and I believe we as foster/adoptive parents should try to keep families intact if at all possible.  He is undoubtedly going to be more troubled than she is; there may be disabilities related to his exposure in utero that we don't even know about yet.  Right now, we can't comfort him.  He is in withdrawal and cries and screams all the time.  I am working at home most days now and he is shrieking as I speak, after throwing up a whole bottle of formula.  Untrained adoptive parents, expecting a cuddly newborn would NEVER be able to deal with this; it is all I can do not to start shrieking, too.


At some point, parenting ceases to be about US and our desires and needs and should be about the children.  I have friends who adopted from overseas; I have no problem with that.  But those who would insist that every embryo come to term should at least consider the plight of children ... at 13, 14, 17 they are still children ... who have no loving arms to go to, who won't have a place to spend Christmas Day and Thanksgiving after they turn 18, who don't have a good emotional role model and family role model as they become young adults and try to establish families of their own.


Life does not END at birth.  That's all I'm saying.

First amendment fan since 1793.
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5 years ago  ::  Mar 06, 2009 - 3:25PM #26
Lonesentinel
Posts: 2,423

Fair enough.


BTW - If you could find the time, and I figure you have very little of that, I would love to see you blog about your experiences with your new adoption, good and bad...I would understand if you don't have the energy though.

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5 years ago  ::  Mar 06, 2009 - 3:57PM #27
Tolerant Sis
Posts: 4,201

Mar 6, 2009 -- 3:25PM, Lonesentinel wrote:


Fair enough.


BTW - If you could find the time, and I figure you have very little of that, I would love to see you blog about your experiences with your new adoption, good and bad...I would understand if you don't have the energy though.




 


I have logged a journal entry ... not sure how to create a blog, but it is public and on my home page, if you want to read it.  

First amendment fan since 1793.
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