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Switch to Forum Live View Worst Movies of 2009?
8 years ago  ::  Dec 28, 2009 - 1:14PM #1
Posts: 14,591

What are your picks for worst movies of 2009?

Peter Hartlaub at the San Francisco Chronicle has compiled his top ten.  With full disclosure, he admits to not having seen Old Dogs, All About Steve, My Life in Ruins, and about 30 other movies that might have made his cut.  But here's his list:

10. Friday the 13th  Less gory, less scary and much less interesting than the original, which was overrated to begin with.  If it weren't for a topless waterskiing sequence, this might have made the worst films top three.

9. Hannah Montana: The Movie  Wholesome and harmless, but if you're not old enough to carry a Hannah Montana lunchbox, this still felt like punishment.  The script was painfully clichéed, and Miley Cyrus was upstaged by Taylor Swift.

8. I Love You, Beth Cooper  The movie equivalent of the Whitesnake album that came out after Nirvana's "Nevermind."  In a decade filled with intelligent teen movies, director Chris Columbus gave us nerd beat-downs and people stepping in cow excrement.

7. Irene in Time  Henry Jaglom didn't just explore his lead character's daddy issues in his latest art film -- he smothered the audience with them.  Irene's obsession with her dead father became almost comical.

6. Dance Flick   Will make you yearn for the subtle humor and profound character exploration of White Chicks.

5. The Haunting in Connecticut  The beginning of the film about a family terrorized by evil spirits announced the events are "based on a true story."  If anything in this movie was true, then we have officially discovered the least intelligent family on Earth.  Just move out, people!

4. Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen  Replaced the creativity of the original with two vaguely racist robots and overblown special-effects scenes.  More than any other movie this year, Transformers 2 was like watching someone else play a video game.

3. Knowing  This weirdly random and almost laughably scripted disaster thriller gets bad-movie bonus points because it was made by a good director (Alex Proyas) and starred Nicolas Cage, who gave one of the best performances of the year in Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans.

2. Paul Blart: Mall Cop  Not since Seinfeld has a movie or TV show done more to promote the fantasy that hot women are really looking for schlubby guys with bad jobs and unbearable personalities.

1. Play the Game  Five words: Andy Griffith receives oral sex.  That impossible-to-remove-from-our-consciousness image makes this otherwise mediocre film the biggest public menace of the year.  Thank goodness Frances Bavier didn't live to see this.

LOL I'm sorry I missed Andy getting oral service Tongue out

So what do you think about this list?  Comprehensive?  Not comprehensive enough?  What films would you add?


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8 years ago  ::  Jan 05, 2010 - 9:55AM #2
Posts: 14

I thought District 9 was awful.  It was about a man who begins to mutate after touching a canister of alien goo.  It got many positive reviews but I just couldn't stomach it.  It's the anti-Avatar. 

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8 years ago  ::  Jan 05, 2010 - 11:31AM #3
Posts: 34

I would love to tell you my list of worst movies for 2009, but I only went to see 3 films all year and they were all pretty good. In my adulthood, I used to see that many films in a month, but with the cost of a movie ticket in my area having gone up 50% in the last year and a half, I have to make sure that it's good before I will consider dropping $9 on a Saturday afternoon discountCool matinee AND THAT'S WITHOUT POPCORN OR SODA.

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8 years ago  ::  Jan 12, 2010 - 4:42PM #4
Posts: 4

My 2 Cents:  A large popcorn here in ole Tampa, FL is $16.00

It is now too expensive to take in a movie.



Moon )O(

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