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Switch to Forum Live View Preparing for death
10 years ago  ::  Jul 08, 2008 - 2:14PM #1
itty
Posts: 2,949
Thank YOU for sharing with me Tootsie. I have seen people keep a terminally ill person from knowing. I have seen people be honest.  I really think knowing what is happening is the best idea.

I appreciate your friend's husband was trying to protect her. In so doing he may have robbed her of some precious time to tie up loose ends, contact people she needed to be with and have the time to really come to a resolution.

I have to wonder, and it looks like you might too, if he was protecting her or himself. I also think you probably have the right of if with her knowing. Somehow most people do.

I love my life. I don't want to die this young. I am a realist and know what the prognosis for GBM is. I am hopeful I can have a few years longer than the average. I am working actively to give myself the best chance of doing just that. I have so much I want to do and that requires time. I'll take what I get and do what I can. Along the way I plan to raise cain and have a rip-roaring good time. Life is to be lived!
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10 years ago  ::  Jun 12, 2008 - 4:47PM #2
Beliefnetsabee
Posts: 600
Hypothetical question. You are terminally ill and your time is near. You're peacefully in a coma, totally unaware of all that is going on around you. You are awakened by a loved one because he wants to talk with you once last time before you die. And he advises you of your impending death.

How would you feel? Are you pleased that you have been awakened or would you rather have stayed asleep, unprepared for your impending death?
I always remember that for every word typed there is a real person sitting behind the keyboard.
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10 years ago  ::  Jun 14, 2008 - 10:28AM #3
MarleneEmmett5
Posts: 1,799
[QUOTE=BeliefnetSabee;559425]Hypothetical question. You are terminally ill and your time is near. You're peacefully in a coma, totally unaware of all that is going on around you. You are awakened by a loved one because he wants to talk with you once last time before you die. And he advises you of your impending death.

How would you feel? Are you pleased that you have been awakened or would you rather have stayed asleep, unprepared for your impending death? [/QUOTE]
BeliefnetSabee:
My late mom passed away in 1974 of an inopberable brain tumor.
My father never told her she had a tumor or that she was dying.
He loved her so very much he didn't want her to know.
Right before she passed she opened her eyes~she had been in a coma- and looked into his eyes
and *asked "Why me,why now" and passed away.
She never knew she was ill.
She was gone,never asking questions before she'd gone into a coma.
I know that she's "at Peace" I know this in my heart.

As we have found out yesterday with the sudden passing of newman TimRussert , no one is "ever prepared to die"
Sometimes *Death* comes swiftly in the blink of an eye,like it did to him.
Othertimes, *Death* is a long drawn out process,taking weeks/months~somtimes years to happen.
I don't know which is better to go swiftly or to have a long illness???
I do know that it's *best* when a person passes in their sleep, like my mom's father did.
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10 years ago  ::  Jun 14, 2008 - 10:52AM #4
spiritalk
Posts: 1,165
When we are prepared (as if we ever are) for death, the transition to another realm goes smoothly and we are welcomed to a whole new adventure.  When we go swiftly and suddenly there is an adjustment to the new condition.  It just makes sense that the more we know, the easier the conditons of death, dying, afterlife.
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10 years ago  ::  Jul 03, 2008 - 9:00PM #5
itty
Posts: 2,949
[QUOTE=BeliefnetSabee;559425]Hypothetical question. You are terminally ill and your time is near. You're peacefully in a coma, totally unaware of all that is going on around you. You are awakened by a loved one because he wants to talk with you once last time before you die. And he advises you of your impending death.

How would you feel? Are you pleased that you have been awakened or would you rather have stayed asleep, unprepared for your impending death? [/QUOTE]

Well I don't quite know how you did it but you certainly hit the very thing, death in a come, that is going to happen to me. I have glioblastoma multiforme-a stage four, incurable brain cancer. When I die I will be in a coma.

Interesting question. If it's possible I hope my brother can wake me before I die and be able to talk to me. Maybe I can give him some comfort. I am not afraid of death. I am not afraid of dying. I am not so certain that I am not afraid of the actual process of physically dying. I think I am afraid of that. Even so I think I want to be able to participate in my passing. I hope I get to. I expect my fear is born of not wanting my death to hurt.  I see death as the closing of one door and the opening of another. I don't know what lies on the other side. I have my own thoughts and beliefs on the matter.  I feel, in my gut, that its the last and greatest adventure in this life.
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10 years ago  ::  Jul 05, 2008 - 3:52AM #6
NothingButLove
Posts: 715

itty wrote:

Well I don't quite know how you did it but you certainly hit the very thing, death in a come, that is going to happen to me. I have glioblastoma multiforme-a stage four, incurable brain cancer. When I die I will be in a coma.


Dear Itty,I am very sorry to hear you have an incurable cancer. But very pleased to hear that you are not scared of passing over. You may be interested to know that even when my mother was alive, but unable to function due to altzheimers, she was capable of talking to a medium, and getting me  a message. Lack of brain function does not inhibit us while we wear a mortal shell, nor will it later.
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10 years ago  ::  Jul 05, 2008 - 8:54AM #7
itty
Posts: 2,949
Thank you. I am certain that I will continue on, in some fashion, after I get shed of this body I live in now.

Have a blesssed day NBL. :)
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10 years ago  ::  Jul 06, 2008 - 3:12PM #8
paulineyear
Posts: 4
[QUOTE=NothingButLove;605462]


Dear Itty,I am very sorry to hear you have an incurable cancer. But very pleased to hear that you are not scared of passing over. You may be interested to know that even when my mother was alive, but unable to function due to altzheimers, she was capable of talking to a medium, and getting me  a message. Lack of brain function does not inhibit us while we wear a mortal shell, nor will it later.[/QUOTE]
I am sorry for your sad news but do not be afraid death is only the beginning.  A birth into an existence far more beautiful than you can ever imagine.  I know because several years ago as I was dying from going into cardiac arrest and i experienced death as not the bully of life but the beginning of life.  I was blessed to have a glimpse of heaven and the Lord who was with me then entire time gave me so much unconditional love we as humans can never imagine.  Do not be afraid for I am with you till the end of the world says Jesus.  Peace be with you always.
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10 years ago  ::  Jul 08, 2008 - 12:10PM #9
Tootsie19
Posts: 172
itty- I am so sorry to hear of your illness, but I am grateful to you for sharing your attitude about living on after death. It is a blessing to be able to learn from those who are going through this part of their journey.

My 37- year old friend died two years ago of a very fast and very vicious form of stomach cancer. She was ill four very painful months, but she was unaware until almost the end that she would die because her husband did not want to hamper her hope that she would live and her desire to fight on.

Truthfully though, I think she "knew" anyway because she was a smart and sensitive girl.

I think I would also like to "know" just because it would help me to prepare for my passing.
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10 years ago  ::  Jul 08, 2008 - 3:34PM #10
Tootsie19
Posts: 172
itty- My prayers go with you and it is my hope that you are able to achieve all that you wish to.
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