There actually is a reason that authoritarian types feel that same-sex marriage detracts from straight marriage, but it's not the kind of conscious thing they can tell you about. They just "know" that doing it differently from "the regular way" hurts "the regular way".
What it is is that authoritarian types often have what sociologists call an external conscience. This means that they rely on the community around them to enforce their morals, as they haven't internalized them enough to do it themselves. (This is the basis for the idea that it's not really wrong until you get caught....) The only way this external conscience business really works is if the whole community shares the same rules. So what they are really objecting to is others having different rules. It makes the whole system crumble because it's no longer clear what morals are being enforced. This lack of clarity is experienced as very threatening because they need and want the community to keep them on the straight and narrow, since they can't do it themselves. So, this change in the rules really is threatening.
Not that I'm sympathetic to this way of thinking, but I've studied it some because it's interesting and I wanted to know.
So, in summary, from their very different world view, having new and different rules really can be very threatening, while the threat is completely invisible to the world view of someone with an internal conscience.
I'm not sure why it's an "issue" either. Certainly not one that pertains to the OP.
Meanwhile ...
"No, that's not what I'm saying. It's the idea that Brad Pitt is ATTRACTED to a WOMAN rather than a man."
Just as Portia de Rossi "is attracted to a WOMAN rather than a man". That is the nature of her orientation. Has NOTHING to do with you or you imagining she has somehow personally "rejected" you.
What MMarcoe is describing is very normal. I run into it all the time and it's very easy to understand. I'm not really grasping why it's an issue.
The dwarves of yore made mighty spells, While hammers fell like ringing bells In places deep, where dark things sleep, In hollow halls beneath the fells.
For ancient king and elvish lord There many a gloaming golden hoard They shaped and wrought, and light they caught To hide in gems on hilt of sword. - J.R.R. Tolkien
You got your feelings hurt because Portia de Rossi "rejected" you?
You should consider a career in comedy, because THAT was funneee.
You didn't grasp what I was saying.
You were saying, "I think it has to do with a fear of rejection -- for example, two people of the same sex are rejecting the opposite sex in a way."
Sorry, but individuals reject individuals, not an entire sex/gender. Portia DeRossi wasn't rejecting YOU. She's not even attracted to you. Likely doesn't even know you exist.
Fine with me. Then she was rejecting the entire male sex, sexually.
But I'm sure you've experienced it somewhere else, so you SHOULD understand it.
Of course I have experienced rejection. But to feel personal rejection in such a case as you described is preposterous. It would be like ME being "upset" because Brad Pitt "chose" Angelina Jolie and not me - a gay man Pitt doesn't even know, let alone is so attracted to that he could have possibly have "chosen" me. Ludicrous.
No, that's not what I'm saying. It's the idea that Brad Pitt is ATTRACTED to a WOMAN rather than a man.
I hope I'm making myself clear.
But if I'm not, just rest assured that for many of us, there is a feeling of rejection. Maybe you don't feel it because you're more advanced than us.
There are three sides to every story: your side, my side, and the truth.
You got your feelings hurt because Portia de Rossi "rejected" you?
You should consider a career in comedy, because THAT was funneee.
You didn't grasp what I was saying.
You were saying, "I think it has to do with a fear of rejection -- for example, two people of the same sex are rejecting the opposite sex in a way."
Sorry, but individuals reject individuals, not an entire sex/gender. Portia DeRossi wasn't rejecting YOU. She's not even attracted to you. Likely doesn't even know you exist.
But I'm sure you've experienced it somewhere else, so you SHOULD understand it.
Of course I have experienced rejection. But to feel personal rejection in such a case as you described is preposterous. It would be like ME being "upset" because Brad Pitt "chose" Angelina Jolie and not me - a gay man Pitt doesn't even know, let alone is so attracted to that he could have possibly have "chosen" me. Ludicrous.
The oft-repeated argument against making same sex marriages legal is that this will detract from traditional marriage. I have wracked my brains trying to figure out how this would come about, and I've been unable to come up with one solid reason.
I was married to my husband for almost 46 years. Ours was a traditional marriage - one man/one woman - but we never felt that the same sex couples in our circle of friends had any effect, positive or negative, on our marriage.
Would those who make the claim give me their reasons for it?
I think it has to do with a fear of rejection -- for example, two people of the same sex are rejecting the opposite sex in a way. If you play a traditional sex role, you will feel some rejection when two gay people of the opposite sex get married. If you do not identify with traditional sex roles, you will feel little or none of that rejection.
If we are honest, most of us will admit that we have personally felt that rejection at least a few times in our lives. I felt it when I found out Portia de Rossi was gay. The more "traditional" they look and act, the worse it feels.
I don't feel any rejection at all in such a case unless I had an emotional attachment to a certain woman, and I would feel that rejection regardless of which gender she chose instead of me. If two lesbians or two gays want get married, more power to them. Further, what you are mentioning can be seen as a two-edged sword. A lesbian or gay person can feel rejected when a female in the case of the lesbian or a male in the case of the gay they feel a connection with decides to marry a heterosexual, or for that matter another person of the same sex. All people should be able to marry the person they lave and want to spend the rest of their lives together regardless of disability, gender, ethnicity, race, nationality, religion, or sexual orientation.
"The genius of the Constitution rests not in any static meaning it might have had in a world that is dead and gone, but in the adaptability of its great principles to cope with current problems and current needs." -- Justice William Brennan: Speech to the Text and Teaching Symposium at Georgetown University,(October 12, 1985)
Considering that LGBT people are no different than anyone else including the way they "Act" then people are in for a LOT of heartache.
In some ways, the LGs often do act differently. I've seen a lot of them act differently around the opposite sex, because they don't have the element of sexual attraction in there.
That element of sexual attraction affects the way we act around people.
There are three sides to every story: your side, my side, and the truth.
Considering that LGBT people are no different than anyone else including the way they "Act" then people are in for a LOT of heartache.
The dwarves of yore made mighty spells, While hammers fell like ringing bells In places deep, where dark things sleep, In hollow halls beneath the fells.
For ancient king and elvish lord There many a gloaming golden hoard They shaped and wrought, and light they caught To hide in gems on hilt of sword. - J.R.R. Tolkien
