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Pause Switch to Standard View Do You Believe in Soulmates?
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Flag Beliefnet_jennifer August 8, 2011 3:20 PM EDT
Do you believe in "soulmates"? Like, there's some perfect person out there made just for you? Did you marry yours or did they slip through your fingers?

I came across this article on the site and it got me thinking.
www.beliefnet.com/Love-Family/Relationsh...

I'm gonna say no. I think we could make a life with any number of people. And yeesh, what a frightening thought that you only get one shot...
Flag Hatman August 8, 2011 6:30 PM EDT

Aug 8, 2011 -- 3:20PM, Beliefnet_jennifer wrote:

Do you believe in "soulmates"? Like, there's some perfect person out there made just for you? Did you marry yours or did they slip through your fingers?

I came across this article on the site and it got me thinking.
www.beliefnet.com/Love-Family/Relationsh...

I'm gonna say no. I think we could make a life with any number of people. And yeesh, what a frightening thought that you only get one shot...


In heaven, yes.  On earth, no.

Too many variables to interfere with perfect happiness---personality clashes, family, money, children, distribution of labor, etc.

Warmest regards-

Hatman

Flag REteach August 8, 2011 6:54 PM EDT

Yes--and I married him. :)

Flag nillawafer August 8, 2011 7:54 PM EDT
i believe in soul mates but i don't believe it has anything to do with eros, although it can. a soul mate could be a friend, or a sibling or parent even. someone you just "jive" with and with whom you have an almost unspoken understanding. there are billions of people in the world. i'm sure there is more than one person who could be a soul mate.
Flag Beliefnet_jennifer August 9, 2011 1:10 PM EDT

Aug 8, 2011 -- 7:54PM, nillawafer wrote:

i believe in soul mates but i don't believe it has anything to do with eros, although it can. a soul mate could be a friend, or a sibling or parent even. someone you just "jive" with and with whom you have an almost unspoken understanding. there are billions of people in the world. i'm sure there is more than one person who could be a soul mate.




Nilla, yes! I agree. I think soulmates can expand to friendships. I've met people who, for no real reason, we just bond together right away.

Flag DotNotInOz September 1, 2011 4:40 AM EDT

Aug 8, 2011 -- 3:20PM, Beliefnet_jennifer wrote:

Do you believe in "soulmates"? Like, there's some perfect person out there made just for you? Did you marry yours or did they slip through your fingers?




This is the common understanding of the term, but it's a much more specialized term than that among Western believers in reincarnation. In the latter context, it refers to a person from one's "soul group," signifying a specific group of entities that agree to associate for the purpose of working out together spiritual lessons that can be learned in physical bodies. In this sense, a soulmate can be your worst enemy--someone from your soul group who has chosen to help you learn an important spiritual lesson by providing a strong degree of resistance in your life. In short, soulmates aren't by any means always "the perfect, most compatible person" for a given individual. And they can be a neighbor, boss, teacher, child, child's friend, etc.--anyone who affects your life somewhat more than one would consider typical for that relationship. 


In the common sense, no, I don't believe there's only one person that can be the "love of your life." In fact, believing that you must find your "one and only" can close you off to satisfying longterm relationships with any number of very nice people, IMO. Feeling that you must find your "soulmate" can become a fixation likely to leave you alone and lonely.

Flag piecesofthewhole September 3, 2011 1:21 PM EDT

Aug 8, 2011 -- 7:54PM, nillawafer wrote:

i believe in soul mates but i don't believe it has anything to do with eros, although it can. a soul mate could be a friend, or a sibling or parent even. someone you just "jive" with and with whom you have an almost unspoken understanding. there are billions of people in the world. i'm sure there is more than one person who could be a soul mate.




Oh, I like this a lot!

Flag karbie September 8, 2011 7:19 AM EDT

I agree. After all, the person we are at 15-25 and onward changes as we move through our lives.so I believe that we can be attuned to other souls and perhaps recognize ones we've known before more than once in our lives. It would be very limited if it was only supposed to be eros, wouldn't it? but as for our 'perfect' soulmate--I agree it's more likely to be in Heaven than here.

Flag Tbduncan September 8, 2011 8:50 AM EDT

While I don't neccesarily believe in the idea of a soul group, as such, I do believe that God has a plan for all of us. So, it makes sense to me that in that spirit, He will lead you to the person who will bring you closer to Himself, and that you can also lead closer to Him. In my experience this usually happens when you are not trying to find that person. Also, there will be some pretty strong "coincidences" that will occur. I can only relate what has happened in my own life, but I have to say, meeting my husband (yes, soulmate) was a very eye-opening experience. For me, one of the "coincidences" was that he has the same birthday as my youngest son, and I have the same birthday as his mom. Little things like this can really catch your attention, and when everything else fits so well, leave little doubt as to God's plan.


Blessings to you and yours!


Tonya

Flag karbie September 9, 2011 12:37 PM EDT

Welcome to beliefnet! I'm truly happy that you and your husband found each other. We have a lot of coincidences on birthdays/anniversaries in our family. When I was growing up, my Grandpa used to have me help him blow out his candles because it was my "half" birthday. My husband proposed on August 15th; his parents were married on September 15. My son and my husband's father had the same birthday/half birthday relationship. My son was not onlly born on the same day as my older sister, he was born on the same day of the week. Since then my cousin's youngest daughter has also been born on that same day. It's also the same day of the month that we were married. One of my Grandma's great-granddaughters was born on her birthday.


My uncle and his wife were true partners and if any two people were soul-mates, they were. When she died unexpectedly last year, he sold their home because everywhere he looked he could see all the things she'd done to decorate it, all the little touches he'd watched her delight in making...but she wasn't there. She went from shoveling snow and laughing one morning to an organ donor the next day--massive stroke. She was only 68. He died just a few weeks ago from cancer--his prognosis went from 3 months to just days. At that point we all agreed if there was any time he was lucid, it belonged to his children and grandchildren. Fortunately he was alert for about 10 minutes the day he died, so his adult ids got to tell him how much they loved him. I was and am grateful to God that they had those moments, especially for his oldest daughter. She traveled the furthest, and I know how much she needed that time to be sure he knew she'd been there for him. I'm just sorry that they lost both parents in less than a year. They were both good people.


 

Flag appy20 September 9, 2011 4:11 PM EDT

I do believe that some people do have soulmates but I don't believe that everyone does.  Two of my uncles married their soulmate.  They both had very hard lives but they and no matter how hard life got, they and  their spouses never turned on each other.  They were faithful, respectful and loving their entire lives.  They practically lived in glass houses due to their close knit community, family and church.  Anyone who was around them did feel there was something out of the ordinary that put those folks together.


However, I don't think that happens to most people.  I know it has not happened nor will happen to me.

Flag karbie September 11, 2011 7:09 AM EDT

I think it is possible to have very good friends without them being a soul-mate. there's just so much hype about it--your one true love, someone who knows how you feel and will never, ever leave you except in death. So people--I don't mean you--may pass by someone who would be very good as a mate, partner, parent because they aren't "soul-mates"...or go from person to person searching for a very rare type of relationship.


Sometimes I think that search is a cop-out. "When I meet my soul-mate, they'll love just as I am without my needing to do anything to build and deepen our bond."  Kind of like the Bridezillas--they have the groom, the ring....and the entire world is supposed to revolve around the bride because it's her Big Day instead of it being the day she and her groom officially begin their lives together. If the groom is just the other figure on the cake, the bride might as well just marry either a manequin or her mirror.


Although in fairness there should be a Groomzilla show for the men who try to micromanage every cost and every breath their intended makes.  Just to balance things out that brides aren't the only crazies out there. I wasn't a bridezilla, but I did call the wedding shop a lot. My dress finally got in on Thursday and I was getting married on Saturday. They had the alterations finished on Friday, but I'd been wondering what was going to happen if it didn't get there!


I wish you the best, soulmate or not.

Flag DotNotInOz September 13, 2011 8:30 AM EDT

Sep 8, 2011 -- 8:50AM, Tbduncan wrote:

Also, there will be some pretty strong "coincidences" that will occur. I can only relate what has happened in my own life, but I have to say, meeting my husband (yes, soulmate) was a very eye-opening experience. For me, one of the "coincidences" was that he has the same birthday as my youngest son, and I have the same birthday as his mom. Little things like this can really catch your attention, and when everything else fits so well, leave little doubt as to God's plan.




Statistically speaking, such coincidences are just that and not actually terribly uncommon.


Interestingly, in my family, my husband and I were born in adjacent months as were his older sister and husband, his younger brother and wife and my in-laws. I've often speculated as to the statistical likelihood of that and wondered how often it occurs to that extent. One might reasonably expect perhaps two couples in a family of this size to have adjacent birth months, but for ALL of us to have them seems somewhat striking.


As for any such leaving "little doubt as to God's plan," well, I leave that type of thinking to those who find it meaningful.

Flag Hdez September 16, 2011 1:09 PM EDT

Hi..


God is our creator and he has a plan for all of us.  Some of us were raised going to church and others just knowing that there is a God.. I was one of the latest. I used to pray to God when something went bad in my life to not even remembering that there was a God at all...


  I was married for 5 years when I was 22 and from it I have a beautiful daughter.. got divroced and a 1 1/2 yr later entered in a really bad 9 year live in relationship with a man who was verbally abusive to me,  heavy smoker inside and outside the house.. and to whom I lost almost everything... when I finally got out of the relationship my daughter and I (she is 17) spent almost the following two years very happy years by oulselves.  Although behind my mind I always wanted to start going to church I really .. didnt look for any.. my main thing to do was going to the gym.. work and my family.. And one day almost a year ago I met my current boyfriend .. a Christian man with a brother and wife... and both pastors... and with their church... and I said to myself .. how lucky I am.. I started going to church but I was a Sunday goer... nothing else.. never in my life read the bible and the bit I learned from the bible was from this Sundays... I kept on with my day to day stuff.. going out every now and then , having a drink when i went out although I was not a drinker at all... on the other hand.. my bf had issues that were not in line with the word of God... he was one of those that if no one knows what he is doing  then no one knows... just that he forgot that the one above us knows us inside and out.. the one .. that no one.. no one can hide from was seeing everything he was doing .. so, well.. abt 3 months ago something happend in my life because of him.. not to mention that my daughter decided a month before that she no longer wanted to be with me... that she was going to her dads... over 2000 miles away. .I was ready to give up on all .. getting ready to  tell my boyfriend to get out because of something  he did behind my back , but after crying all night and asking myself and him .. the why me question.. if all I did was take care of all and love him and my daughter ... why he had to do what he did... I found myself in the middle of the night going on my phone and looking for what the bible had to say about Love... this?.. was the most incredible experience in my life... i know now that my God was calling unto me... my Awesome God ...that night I learned what Love really is.. not this "world" love i grew up with...that night changed  my life ...I'm still a baby at my faith but I know that I know that I could never ever go back to the way I was before..... I was born again...I felt in love with my God.... 


well, my point is  that like I said previously, God has a plan for everyone of his kids..for us... he knows our past, present and future... because we are his creation... His love towards us can not be measured.. God gives changes to all of us all the time and many do not take on... It was because of my boyfriend that I'm saved today... I could go on and on writing testimoies of what had happend around me and on me since that night ... no matter what comes my way nothing will ever take away my faith in my awesome God... He will never loose me... The changes im seeing in my boyfriend's life are all because of His marvelous presence in our lives...I pray a lot for him...  the fight is still on and  I know that God will hold us up with His victorious right hand very very soon.. God's plans for us are for good and not for disaster... praise the Lord!! ...  we are to become one when we meet our other half... and even from when we first met I always felt we were.. we were and still do and say things at the same time... think same things at the same time..  there were times that we will look at ourselves with faces of like... I cant believe this... :)


The end of all is that either if we are soulmate or not .. any type of relationship could only survive an eternal life just and when God and His words are present in our lives.. We are to love one another with the kind of love God has for us as in 1 Corinthians 13... if there is any other kind of love (world love) in your lives, the chances of having a relationship are less that zero...


sorry for the long story but I just had to share...


´╗┐God Bless you all!!....

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