| 2 years ago :: Jun 22, 2011 - 10:55AM #1 | |
|
Well looks like you got a live one here folks, and that would be me on an "up" day and on a "down" day would be worthless. I recently was diagnosed with Bipolar disorder and was confirmed yesterday.
On the upside of things, I am relieved to be finally diagnosed with what seems to be working with treatment, but is taking a while to adjust. I had been diagnosed with ADHD, PTSD and was on meds for that but one was not working quite well with me and I would have relapses. Unfortunately, not being diagnosed and on the right med cocktail, led me to ruin relationships with friends, family and especially the one I had recently wrote about in April. I didn't see the signs but when I was diagnosed, i had a flashback of all the episodes and incidents I created and let me tell you, i wanted to vomit. because this is a treatable illness, i am taking every step necessary to get on the right track to stay stable and allow the positive traits of somebody with bipolar and focus on the good and try not to sway to the bad. There are some great qualities that come with being bipolar, unfortunately it's the beast within that has to be tamed. I mention all of the above because I was in a tumultous 6 year relationship and have a daughter who is going on 4 and once again, for the 4th time, I left my boyfriend in probably the worst way possible. Of all things, he is STILL willing to rebuild a relationship with me and is wanting to be a family with our daughter. Problem is, we can't really take the regular steps most people take to rebuild because i am now 2000 miles away. Although we are visiting for a couple of weeks, what then? Funny how fear of abondonment was one of my major issues and there I went doing what i feared the most. As soon as I fled 2000 miles and arrived to my hometown, i knew something was wrong and i immediately sought treatment and have been going 3x a week, new meds, new therapist and i have had some sort of a breakthrough. A dear friend called it an epiphany. It may just be. He knows I am recently diagnosed as Bipolar and well, all i can do is hope for the best. We have been separated since April and will be seeing him in a few weeks. All my stuff is still there, like my car, most of my clothes and belongings. I want to jump right back in and be with him and our family, but know that probably won't happen this trip. I am still struggling daily but the struggle seems to be getting less and less of one, which is a good thing. Being bipolar i initially thought would be the worst thing I could ever hear. But now having some time to learn about it and it explaining alot of my previous erratic behavior, up and down, up and down, i now feel relieved. Too bad being bipolar has a negative stigma attached to it, but hopefully for the people who do know about it will be supportive and the people who don't, learn about it. It is a mental illness, but it is a treatable one. Any thoughts, prayers, suggestions, insight of any kind would be appreciated. Thank you for reading this. -on an UP day Clarissa |
|
|
Quick Reply
|
|
| 2 years ago :: Jun 22, 2011 - 3:33PM #2 | |
|
Yeah, my sister was diagnosed bipolar a few years ago. So as one related to Give yourself a break. Please. This is something out of your hands (when you were not properly diagnosed/treated). What was done in the past may be regrettable,but it cannot be changed. It can be explained now. And that’s good. Now you have the means to make better choices. So make this evident in all you do. Repairing relationships will require time, patience and understanding on all parties. You might consider seeking relationship counseling to heal some of the most important relationships in your life.
While there are some folks who remain in the dark ages, most people are very understanding of those who have mental illnesses. Please don’t let fear of the stigma cause you to shy away from anyone or keep you from doing anything. Might take some time to learn all you can about this illness so you will be in possession of correct information. Don't let others tell you what your limitations are due to this illness. Take care, |
|
|
Quick Reply
|
|
| 2 years ago :: Jun 22, 2011 - 8:33PM #3 | |
|
Clarissa-
Someone asked me a while back if i was suffering from mental illness; i replied "Nope." "i'm enjoying every minute of it!" Seriously, though, i was diagnosed with what you got back in '87...though maybe not as bad a case as your own. Warmest regards- Hatman
"History records that the moneychangers have used every form of abuse, deceit, intrigue, and violent means possible to maintain their control over governments by controlling money and it's issuance."
-- James Madison(1751-1836), Father of the Constitution for the USA, 4th US President |
|
|
Quick Reply
|
|
| 6 months ago :: Nov 30, 2012 - 2:20AM #4 | |
Its not about the distance. Its just that you need to understand the part love plays between you and you can go through as you wish to. Just try thinking upon it as distances never matter in a relationship. ____________________ |
|
|
Quick Reply
|
|