When I think of it now, I'm glad he cheated so that I can divorce him- although when I initially discovered his cheating, it was the worst pain my heart ever felt, because I trusted him for so many years.  We even had a pure dating relationship when we were dating.  I never imagined before that he would do such a thing.  So, right after we were married, there were a lot of things that I had just learned about him in finally living together- and so I thought, "What have I gotten myself into?"  I forced myself to love him even though there was no longer any chemistry between us after a time.  I just kept reminding myself of how much I longed to be married when I was single.  I believe that after our children, my hormones changed and so I had to sacrifice more in order to please him.   I became used to that for several years.  I use to say to myself, "I love him, but I'm not in love with him." 

I gave him another chance after he cheated, but then when he cheated again, that was it.  God made it clear that I should divorce him.  I'm excited about divorcing him.  And I made a vow to God that I will never remarry.  I have rededicated my life to God- although I was striving to live a godly life all along.  God has always been faithful and abundantly merciful.   God was the One who strengthened my broken heart whereas now, I even pray that my x-husband will find him someone else that he'll be happy with.  My soul finds rest in God alone.