|3 years ago :: Mar 08, 2010 - 2:55AM #41|
The reports here of the death of Chivalry (or disinterest in it), are greatly exaggerated.
Some people are better at solving problems than others. That's a simple fact. I'm someone who's quite good at identifying and implementing solutions to problems, my own and other peoples. I enjoy it. In fact, that's essentially what I get paid for, have been for the past 30 years and I make very good money at it because I'm an expert. But I do it even when I'm not at work because I enjoy it and it provides me a feeling of accomplishment that I happen to value.
When I enter into a relationship, I look for opportunities to apply my talents. I want to contribute positive energy into the relationship, not just sit back and take whatever I can get. After all, that's who I am-- for me, it's more important to give. If you don't need or want anything or anyone, fine, but as far as I'm concerned, if I have nothing to offer you, that wouldn't leave me much of a reason to hang around.
If your esteem is so fragile that you cannot let someone else do something nice for you for fear of future expectations, I would say the bigger problem is yours. I rather enjoy being a "Knight," I'm good at it, I'm rightfully proud of it, and naturally like to show off my abilities.
Fortunately, in virtually all cases it's been well appreciated. I've yet to encounter attitudes like I've read here in the real world.