Post Reply
Page 2 of 3  •  Prev 1 2 3 Next
Switch to Forum Live View What is the best advice you have been given on coping with a broken heart?
5 years ago  ::  Feb 03, 2010 - 10:14PM #11
bee
Posts: 4

Someday he will just be a boy you once knew. 

Quick Reply
Cancel
5 years ago  ::  Feb 07, 2010 - 8:56AM #12
Lura
Posts: 2

At 79 I have dealt with numerous heartbreaks. I grew up in a quiet, peaceful family and never could adjust to loud voices, quarrels, threats along with losing various loved ones one way or another. I found that much advice and the usual ways to lessen heartbreat, such as escape or revenge,  did not work for me but only made the situation worse. I learned, however, to talk to the Lord about it; He is my best counselor. He is there when people are not; His love doesn't change like people love and He guides me in my decisions. Yes, I sometimes do the wrong thing but He forgives me for that. I need Him more than I need anyone or anything and I thank Him daily for living in me. I am far from perfect but I ask Him to help me be the one He sees in me. He has blessed me beyond words and I know that I can trust in Him. Not being able to trust many others brought this truth to my heart.

Quick Reply
Cancel
5 years ago  ::  Feb 07, 2010 - 9:40AM #13
deborah
Posts: 2

what great advice thank you this has truly blessed me!!

Quick Reply
Cancel
5 years ago  ::  Feb 07, 2010 - 9:43AM #14
deborah
Posts: 2

There is a song by Barbra Streisand that says"although you're someone that I choose to love from now on you're someone that I used to love"...I think that says it all!!

Quick Reply
Cancel
5 years ago  ::  Feb 07, 2010 - 7:26PM #15
Gmadrid
Posts: 1

How to cope with a broken heart? Simple pray to the lord for a whole much of moral support and go out and live life to the fullest with your true friends and family members. Go to church every week. Just take it one step at a time.


CoolYour friend in Christ,


GMadrid

Quick Reply
Cancel
5 years ago  ::  Feb 08, 2010 - 12:48PM #16
rickyvilleza
Posts: 81

In 2002 I came home from a long trip cut off from the world (no cell phone) and found out my baby brother died at 43 years old.  I went through a terrible heartache and depression for about a year.  I thought my life and my family was over.  I thought it would be all downhill from there, at 48 years old.


It was my friends that helped me out of the depths of my depression.


Since then I have had too many adventures to mention and more thrills than I could ever imagine.


The downside (and upside) is: life.  There have been so many ups and downs since that awful 2002.


Now, I'm on the downhill side again with another heartbreak.  I remind myself of my life since 2002, and know there will be an upside coming soon.

Quick Reply
Cancel
5 years ago  ::  May 17, 2010 - 4:14PM #17
Tillie
Posts: 42

Losing someone is what my son is going through now; it hurts the whole family too.  We have the lil' boy at our home along w/our hurting son.  I listen to him quite a bit, esp. in the beginning part of his loss.  You see his wife left him for his best friend!  It has been almost a year now and thank God our son is getting though this terrible loss of separation and deception.  This took alot of listening and praying to God to help him.  I have asked people to pray for him and his lil' son too.  God is mending his heart and he is getting back on his feet now.  We continue to affirm his dreams and goals he has set for himself and his son; of course I still continue to pray for him and thank God for all His help. 

Quick Reply
Cancel
5 years ago  ::  Jun 02, 2010 - 11:40AM #18
David
Posts: 287

there is an old saying...if the horse throws you...get off your ass and get right back on...best advice I have ever heard.Laughing  

Quick Reply
Cancel
4 years ago  ::  Sep 01, 2010 - 11:45AM #19
Sally461
Posts: 3

I am new so not sure how to post anything. Also not good on these chat rooms. I am going through a breakup that i acutally caused and the guilt is killing me.  He is eight years younger than me so that bothered me. He lived with me and basically i being the woman and he the man it was more like even though I am the woman in the relationship i had to be the man and the woman  because he never took control of what  a man is suppose to do . Repair stuff worry about the bills, cut grass or whatever. He has been without a job for over a year and i just had enough again -- I mean if he loved me wouldn't i feel it in his actions?  His actions seem more like he did not care and he was just living there to have somewhere to live, I feel like he was a bum but why stay with me all these years and come back-- because he got a free ride basically???  He talked to me like a dog all the time. This has been going on for 12 years. We have never married- We have split over the 12 years so many times i can't not remember. I guess with the low self esteem and his ability to make me feel like its all my fault i would always take him back. Sometimes calling and begging him.. Its like a sick addiction because as soon as he comes back he is the same way if not worse and i feel like he has an attitude that i owe him i don't know i just know it is so very unhealthy i am wore down i don't like feeling guilty and i am trying my best not to call im to beg him to come back.  I do love him don't know why -- He will be the type you have to take care of but yet he wants to control everything -- what do i do to get strong and not feel guilty and move on -- why can't i let him go

Quick Reply
Cancel
4 years ago  ::  Sep 01, 2010 - 2:26PM #20
Hatman
Posts: 9,634
Sally-

what do i do to get strong and not feel guilty and move on


Best thing for that is to find someone new and far better.

-- why can't i let him go


In truth, only you can answer this, but i suspect that "the devil you know is better than the devil you don't" may play it's part.  Perhaps part of you fears that the next guy will be worse(but i don't know how that'd be possible).

As to how to "get strong"?  You could maybe start by either going to a gym or making some gym equipment; hanging a bag from a rafter and beating it with your fists could certainly help in a lot of ways, not only making you stronger and more "light", but also letting you vent your frustration and anger at this layabout do-nothing wastrel you've spent TWELVE YEARS being the victim to his vampirish ways.  (bloodsucking, using you, sitting around like a lump, etc.)

Here's two things i'd like you to remember:  Write 'em down.  Put them where you'll see them every day for at least a month---on the back of your front door, on your refrigerator, on your mirror, wherever, and the first is this:

"Nobody can take advantage of you unless you LET them."
"You teach people how to treat you by what you will---or WILL NOT---accept."

If you can stay strong for at least 6 weeks to 2 months, i can almost guarantee that this bf will contact YOU and want YOU back.  It would be best if, at that time, you could say something like: "Hold on a minute; i'll let you talk to my boyfriend(or fiancĂ©)," then hand the phone to him.

If you "love" him still, it may be a good idea for you to write down just what you think Love is and means.

After you do this, maybe make two lists, one the things you like/love about him, and one the things you hate/despise about him.  Let a few days go by between making list one and list two.  Then, compare them, see which is longer, and which behaviors you're prepared to accept from him and which not.

But he seems to have proven that he's a leech, and leeches only drop off once they're so full and sleepy that they can't get any more blood out of you...or in your case, time, money, and attention.

It is also entirely possible that you DO have a sick obsession/addiction to either him or his personality type, and if so, you'll probably need at least a few counseling sessions with a proper therapist to a) find out why you do, and b) how to overcome that desire/substitute a desire for a far better man for you.

If you do not, i'd say that the chances are very high that you simply will not be attracted to a personality type that is more helpful and supportive---you'll look for(and find, more's the pity) someone almost exactly like him, then repeat the pattern, probably because it's the one that feels most comfortable and recognizable to you.

Warmest regards-

Hatman

"History records that the moneychangers have used every form of abuse, deceit, intrigue, and violent means possible to maintain their control over governments by controlling money and it's issuance."
-- James Madison(1751-1836), Father of the Constitution for the USA, 4th US President
Quick Reply
Cancel
Page 2 of 3  •  Prev 1 2 3 Next
 
    Viewing this thread :: 0 registered and 1 guest
    No registered users viewing
    Advertisement

    Beliefnet On Facebook