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Switch to Forum Live View Are men turned off by independent women?
4 years ago  ::  Mar 29, 2011 - 7:27PM #41
Nonchristianheaven
Posts: 147

Some men like independent women to take care of them while they stay home and watch video games.


Some men like independent women because they had a mother that used to yell at them and was bossy and they miss that.


Some men like independent women because they don't want to pay for everything or don't want to share their money with a female.


Some men like independent women because they feel safe with them or they like the woman having confidence.


Of course it depends on what you mean by independent.


Independent or Overbearing?


Independent to some men means, bossy, loud, outspoken, having an opinion.


Independent to some men could just mean wearing make-up. There are all kinds.


 

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3 years ago  ::  Apr 25, 2011 - 2:50PM #42
appy20
Posts: 10,165

I do think it does help to define independence.  For me independence is  more than having to deal with the leaky roof myself; it is also about not wanting anyone else to deal with it.  It seems to be me that if you are bitter about dealing with the roof, then you are not truly independent. You are just needy without someone to depend on.  That is no independence. 


I don't think independence is trampling on someone else's opinion.  I think of it as not needing anything or expecting anything to be provided for free.  I think it is perfectly acceptable for an independent woman to want a man. Although, I have long since outgrown that, Thank God.  If she wants a man, then he has something of value he can offer to her.  However, an independent woman chooses what is of value to her and doesn't let life or the man choose for her.  I don't think I am independent because I don't want a man. I am independent because I don't need one that I don't hire. 


I think of independence as being content without a man.  I don't need a man to feel content. 


I think of independence as not needing emotional support from others.  It is nice if you get it but it isn't required.  I certainly don't need it because i have never had it during the worst moments of my life and yet I survived and thrived. 


I think true independence is also about not wanting a man to want me when i don't want him.  Why would you want someone to want you when you don't want them?  Independence is about not making yourself over to please someone you don't want.  True independence respects others' rights to do the same. 


When I was young, while I was never excessively needy, I was not as independent as I am now.  I am much happier and better off now.

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3 years ago  ::  Apr 28, 2011 - 4:12PM #43
Laurann06
Posts: 2

I do not believe that men are turned off by independant women, in fact many men are intrigued by independant women. I know for that my ex is now my ex because I was not independant enough. Men in my view like women that have their own career, hobbies, interests etc...


For me, when you quit looking for a partner, they seem to come along.

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3 years ago  ::  May 07, 2011 - 11:19PM #44
tattwo
Posts: 286

Apr 28, 2011 -- 4:12PM, Laurann06 wrote:


For me, when you quit looking for a partner, they seem to come along.





So very true!


Independence...I like the fact that I know I can take care of myself, but I also enjoy the company of men. I let a man be a man. If he wants to open the doors, etc. I let him. I still have some old fashion ways in me. I like to be "courted". We don't take time out anymore to get to no each other. Everybody seems to want to jump in the bed with each other. Then wake up the next morning, looking like "what the hell just happened".LOL!!!

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3 years ago  ::  May 10, 2011 - 3:50PM #45
Bezant
Posts: 1,338

Generally (touch wood)...EVERYONE -- man, woman-- wants someone strong enough to stand on their two feet and humble enough to let people 'in.'


If you don't love and respect yourself, who will?


If you make yourself a brick wall, who'll want to know you?

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3 years ago  ::  Jun 01, 2011 - 4:20PM #46
Ladyghosthunter
Posts: 19

For me, when you quit looking for a partner, they seem to come along.


 


BINGO!!!


 


 

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3 years ago  ::  Jun 29, 2011 - 5:18PM #47
appy20
Posts: 10,165

Jun 1, 2011 -- 4:20PM, Ladyghosthunter wrote:

For me, when you quit looking for a partner, they seem to come along.


 


BINGO!!!


 


 


Not true. I haven't been looking in 12 years. LOL


 

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3 years ago  ::  Jun 29, 2011 - 5:25PM #48
Ladyghosthunter
Posts: 19

Jun 29, 2011 -- 5:18PM, appy20 wrote:

Jun 1, 2011 -- 4:20PM, Ladyghosthunter wrote:


For me, when you quit looking for a partner, they seem to come along.


 


BINGO!!!


 


 




Not true. I haven't been looking in 12 years. LOL


 




In fact that is true statement in many cases because I've seen it happen. Yours must be a rare case...

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3 years ago  ::  Aug 04, 2011 - 1:18PM #49
EYEZonIRELAND27
Posts: 1

One womans point of view (please bear that in mind). The problem is that we have not fully graduated into a world / society where the old "rules" of women only cook, clean, and raise children and men are the sole income of a household do not apply for every home / household. There are a ton of women out there who truly believe they are not complete until they have a man in their life. There's a big difference between depending on a man in your life and the desire to have a man in your life. I am an independent woman myself ... self sufficent. I am happy with this fact. Truth is today, it's too easy for people to get out of relationships and marriages. So reality says to me, be independent because heaven forbid you rely on a man and he one day decides to leave you ... you won't be lost. There are too many women who almost don't know how to function without a boyfriend / fiance / husband in their lives and it's scary. No man will ever complete you ... YOU have to complete you. Be happy with all the blessings God has given to you from your abilities, senses, and talents. This is TRUE happiness. Now with all that being said, I'd love to meet a great guy who will love me for me - independence and all. I may not be a damsel in distress, but I know how to love too! I have tons of room in my heart the right man. But much like the way things are today, a guy sees me roll up in my SUV or lift something heavy or say I have a good paying full-time job and automatically I'm not worth the trouble because I can do everything myself ... not true. There are things in life when it would be nice to not have to deal with it alone. But the automatic write-off seems to be the most common response I get. So I pray. I say to God, "If I'm meant to be with someone, please give me the patience to wait (and send him soon), but if I'm not meant to be with someone, please help me to accept this." It's not easy. The thought that I may never meet someone, but again, reality says that not everyone gets married. I may be one of those people. All in all, I'll take my independence and try to hold on to that hope (no matter how small) that someone who can handle my independence will come along ... Girls remember YOU are worth it! Don't EVER let anyone tell you or make you feel otherwise!!! Much Love!

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