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Switch to Forum Live View How Important is Religion to a Relationship
6 years ago  ::  Jan 20, 2009 - 7:18PM #21
ArnieBeeGut
Posts: 1,407
"All you need is love"   -John Lennon
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6 years ago  ::  Jan 21, 2009 - 12:55PM #22
appy20
Posts: 10,165
John Lennon who abandoned his first wife and son and cheated on Yoko, albeit with her permission and couldn't get along with Paul.   Fat lot he knew about love.
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6 years ago  ::  Jan 21, 2009 - 8:17PM #23
wyrmy
Posts: 321
appy

What is the reason for the negativity? You seem reasonably intelligent and I envy the fact that you have access to cheethas(sp?). But then people, especially children think that I must be happy because I get to train robots.
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6 years ago  ::  Jan 22, 2009 - 1:00AM #24
Basil1951
Posts: 204
IMHO, if your religious preference is important to you in general, it will be important in your relationship to your spouse. 

Your relationship with your spouse should be the most important one in your life and if religion is important to the rest of your life, it should also be part of that relationship.  It does not have to be the same preference -- but that would certainly make things easier.  If they are different, each spouse must choose to respect the feelings and experiences the other has had in their religious preference. 

Love, respect, and trust are choices we make in regard to our spouses.  Communication is a skill, it has to be learned. 

Basil
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5 years ago  ::  Jan 22, 2009 - 1:41PM #25
appy20
Posts: 10,165
Wyrmy, I just think that it takes more than love and that whole love is all you need is immature.  Love is a seriously difficult endeavor.
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5 years ago  ::  Jan 22, 2009 - 2:42PM #26
ArnieBeeGut
Posts: 1,407
An immature approach to love will of course be ineffective and by itself only lead to unhappiness.

With a mature approach to love, however, it is indeed "all you need."

Simple - but not easy.
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5 years ago  ::  Jan 22, 2009 - 3:36PM #27
appy20
Posts: 10,165
I just don't think love is enough.  You need skills.  You can love with all your heart to the best of your ability but if you don't have the skills then all is for naught. You can love and be unskilled.
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5 years ago  ::  Jan 22, 2009 - 4:51PM #28
ArnieBeeGut
Posts: 1,407
What is described is of course an immature approach to love.  Manipulation has no place in genuine love.

Mature love never says "If you loved me you would..." And in any event, nobody can be manipulated without their consent.

It is true that not all relationships "work" - and that does not alter in any way what is being claimed.

In a committed long-term relationship, "all" that is needed is love - but of course the genuine kind, not the childish kind.
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5 years ago  ::  Jan 22, 2009 - 5:16PM #29
appy20
Posts: 10,165
It isn't always about maturity.  Sometimes it is about ignorance.  Sometimes it is about wiring.  Sometimes it is about the exhaustion from life's issues.   Love is for perfect people.
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5 years ago  ::  Jan 22, 2009 - 5:27PM #30
DesertKat
Posts: 436
If love were truely for only perfect people, then love would be for no one at all.  Love isn't about being perfect or even perfect for someone.  Its about being you and being content with yourself and the one you love.  Its about knowing that your loved one enjoys his farts more then you enjoy new shoes but being able to laugh it off on the good days and shake your head and tolerate it on the bad ones.
Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfils the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things.
Winston Churchill
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