Jul 3, 2012 -- 5:39PM, Iwantamotto wrote:

I was spanked and I'm sane.  *twitch twitch*

:D

 

In all seriousness, though, any "issues" I have are from arbitrary abuse, not the spanking.  No, it was the beating, the threats of abandonment, etc.  I only rarely tap the butts of my labs, but I know their canine family would've had no problems with showing the kids the error of their ways.  At any rate, when I cry at night over memories of childhood, it's not the spanking that traumatizes, but the knowledge that I just didn't do it for my parents, who were hoping apparently for something else.

 

There are worse things than spanking.  Forgive me if I feel those who cry over being spanked are whining.

Dogs disipline their young by shaking them. Might be more effective than striking them.

 Anyway, I get what you're saying, and I'm sorry you parents were apparently so horrible to you. All people have faults, and my folks were no exception, but at least they adored me, and always let me know. 

My folks also applied some corporal punishment. And my Grandparents even more so.

I've had the somewhat unique perspective of parenting/co parenting over a relatively long span of time -- and still will be parenting for quite some time to come -- because my children/step-children are so widely spread out in age.

When I first began parenting, I was still in my 20s, far more hot-headed than I am now, far less apt to question family tradition --  and I did apply some spanking. 

I am now well into my 40s. And perhaps just by way of mellowing with age, but also by gaining knowledge and perspective, I no longer believe in spanking, and regret ever having done it.

My apporach to parenting the five-year-old in our household now is far different than my approach was when my now youg adult older children were that age. 

That's just my two cents. 

Jul 5, 2012 -- 9:43PM, mountain_man wrote:

Jul 5, 2012 -- 4:44PM, mytmouse57 wrote:

Dogs disipline their young by shaking them. Might be more effective than striking them.

The only problem with that is that we are not dogs. As humans we are supposed to be a bit more intelligent.

true, why would anyone seek a physical remedy? of course to use intelligence one must have some.....

Jul 5, 2012 -- 9:59PM, mainecaptain wrote:

Jul 5, 2012 -- 9:43PM, mountain_man wrote:

Jul 5, 2012 -- 4:44PM, mytmouse57 wrote:

Dogs disipline their young by shaking them. Might be more effective than striking them.

The only problem with that is that we are not dogs. As humans we are supposed to be a bit more intelligent.

true, why would anyone seek a physical remedy? of course to use intelligence one must have some.....

I think that some people create a false connection between lack of any discipline and lack of physical discipline.

When you look at the world today, I think the younger generation (in general, not all) tends to have less respect for their elders.  How many times have you been in a grocery store and seen a child throwing a fit or actually yelling at or hitting their parents and think, "That would have never been tolerated by my parents."  

So, people make this false connection...less parents spank their kids nowadays, and there seems to be worse and worse behavior coming from kids these days, so that must be why.  But, it's not why.  The reason we have so many out of control kids has nothing to do with lack of physical discipline, it has to do with lack of any consistent discipline at all.  

People who think spanking is the only way to control a child's behavior should try taking the time to be consistent with any other form of discipline.  Too many parents are too lazy to put forth the effort.

Reward good behavior and  punish wrong behavior.  They go together. That is the way to educate a  dog, a child a bird or whatever.  There are all kinds of punishments. They should not be jumbled all together. 

 Spanking may be the right thing to do in  extreme situations. But if  it gets to that, the battle was probably lost already. Trying to come up with a fixed approach is not very smart.