Nov 14, 2011 -- 11:39AM, mikeincolorado wrote:

I celebrated 18 years today. Thanks

Congratulation Mike!  Keep doing whatever you're doing only do it even better ...

Dec 4, 2011 -- 10:24AM, mikeincolorado wrote:

Best part? I'm not doing anything . Just being, and it's wonderful

Actually Mike as I see it, and I'm certainly not in your head, that may or may not be so. I think you maybe selling yourself short!  I suspect if you're doing nothing, nothing positive would happen. So your idea of just being must take some sort of positive spiritual action and physical energy, even though you are enjoying the ride ...

As for me a long time ago I lost that obsession, that state of mind and body with dictated how I would act and react to life's situation, that usually brought me back to alcohol as a way of dealing with most daily issues I felt at the time were too much for poor, poor me. Since the obsession has long since been gone I no longer feel the need to have that 1st drink which triggered the craving and the need to live within my character defects rather then working through them. Today when a problem arises I work through the pain whether that pain is a fear, an anger, an envy, a jealousy, or whatever could possible create that well know obsession. Today I'm a recovered alcoholic so the effort seems not as great to remain as such and it could be perceived as doing nothing to stay sober. But following and living the spiritual path is not the easier, softer way. It takes daily vigilance from me to stay focus. As AA literature says, we are given a daily reprieve contingent upon our spiritual condition ....

Have a great new year Mike and anyone else that may come across this post ....

Best of the season as well ...

Well it is subjective, but I really don't feel like I'm exerting any effort at this point.

The great fact is just this, and nothing less: That we have had deep and effective spiritual experiences* which have revolutionized our whole attitude toward life, toward our fellows and toward God’s universe. The central fact of our lives today is the absolute cer­tainty that our Creator has entered into our hearts and lives in a way which is indeed miraculous. He has commenced to accomplish those things for us which we could never do by ourselves.

Dec 23, 2011 -- 1:54PM, mikeincolorado wrote:

So I'm then faced with the question of what I can/cannot do for myself? When I say "I'm not doing anything" it speaks to my inability to solve my alcoholic problem.

There is a very interesting (to me) conflict/paradox between "personal responsibility" and "personal powerlessness". I placed such an emphasis on responsibility that my lack of power got lost. I submit that emphasis on responsibility can be a subtle trap. I feel there is a balance to be struck, and for me that has been a long time coming. Mostly to my unwillingness (inability?) to admit complete defeat.

In the terms of the religious institution I grew up in, I was trying to earn my salvation (sobriety).

Yes I agree Mike.  Today the thought of "salvation" doesn't really enter the equation.  I'm more concerned with just becoming better than I was yesterday for no other reason then I should be the best I can while I have the chance so I can be of help.  Without being spiritually fit it is hard to be of maximum assistance to the still suffering alcoholic or to society at large.  Sounds egotistical in a way but it really isn't.  That is the purpose I see for every human being as we go through life.  To be of help to each other.  We alcoholics can get the power to do so through the 12 steps when worked on a daily bases ...

As to powerlessness/responsibility, I see it as I can't stay alive by myself.  I need food!  The food is in front of me put there by my higher power (my wife).  My responsibility is to reach out and eat it ...

In AA my responsibility is to suit up and show up and become willing to become involved for what I need is there.  God provides the power within the 12 step program and it is my responsibility to follow the suggested steps.  It takes nothing but a desire not to drink to be a membership of the fellowship of AA.  But it takes following the suggestions to be an active member of the program and to be of help and for that I am responsible ...