a long time ago after years of trying to keep my sanity I did something stupid and got caught up in the mental health system...  I think I admitted to hearing voices and ended up with medication, which actually helped for a long time and was eventually grateful even though it didn't sound so nice that they were calling me hallucinatory.

A couple of years ago I started having problems with hallucinations again, and I said something to my doctor and he raised the medications.  Which is fine as far as it goes,  but about  year into that he made a comment in the roundabout way that psychiatrists make comments, which basically said he didn't think I was having problems with hallucinations at all, and that I was just trying to get attention.

This bothered me, a lot.  And I was like, is this for real?  Hurt my head by telling me I have hallucinations when it seems very real to me, then when I take the treatment and get used to feeling better but the hallucinations come back, hurt my head by telling me I no longer have hallucinations but am just doing a grab for attention?

Honestly, I could get the same treatment from the 'hallucinations' themselves, for free and without having to pay doctors, insurance companies, and medicine vendors.  And without having to feel terrible about how little people think of me.  So much for those who say they want to help!

oh don't mind me I just like to complain...  all works out for the best of all involved I guess...

Nov 27, 2009 -- 12:50PM, Karma_yeshe_dorje wrote:

koala972:  "I just like to complain." RD Laing said that characterised mental illness!

I'd be willing to buy into other people's version of the 'real' reality, iff other people's version of the 'real' reality didn't mean I was going to get emotionally abused all day long.  For example by being considered 'worthless' for appearing to be co-dependent.  But at this point I've pretty much had it with that crap and will leave you to yours.

Aug 8, 2010 -- 12:21PM, Karma_yeshe_dorje wrote:

«Laing argued that the strange behavior and seemingly confused speech of people undergoing a psychotic episode were ultimately understandable as an attempt to communicate worries and concerns, often in situations where this was not possible or not permitted.»

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ronald_Laing#On_me...

try to pretend the crap I go through actually means something in god's eyes...  unfortunately I can't listen to what people try to tell me to do because of the meanness that always ensues when I try.  But I do take my meds, that seems to help and I'm grateful at least for that much...