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5 years ago  ::  Jan 07, 2009 - 2:08PM #11
Dreamer1964
Posts: 1
I met my husband in rehab over 19 years ago.  We went to one meeting when we got out and thought we just needed each other.  But, over the years we still used in our own ways.  About a year ago, he was in two major car wrecks and drunk both times.  At that point, he knew things had to change.  So he went back in to rehab (ironically, the one we met at) and got sober.  Now, this past year has been the best year in our 18 years of marriage.  I thank "God" (my higher power) everyday.  I walk around and say the serenity prayer to myself just to get me through each day, not matter what problem I am dealing with. 

Since that year is almost here, we both attend meetings daily, he goes to AA (which I am so grateful for) and I go Al-Anon.  We still have a lot to work on but if it wasn't for the meeting, whose knows where our family would be right now.  No matter if u go once a week or everyday, or who your higher power may be, just be thankful that where you are in your life, someone or something has gotten you there.

Its nice to have a site to talk about the program and your beliefs, I wish I would have found this a long time ago.

To everyone out there who is staying straight, just remember "One Day At A Time".

Best wishes to All!!

Dreamer

[QUOTE=cherubino;952103]Sometimes I think we need a  new vocabulary here, because the meanings of the words "addiction" and  "alcoholism" become awfully vague and open-ended when these are used  to categorize behaviors as dissimilar as knitting or stamp  collecting with needing to pour a stiff shot of vodka with trembling hands at  6:00 AM to calm one's stomach and nerves. Been there, done that. But it's also an exercise in factual  futility to make these terms specifiable and quantifiable, and so generalize  from particular cases to a set of norms that apply to everyone.
 
Here's my favorite story  about that. [FONT=Trebuchet MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080]A friend of mine is a  retired DJ and music reporter from Hartford, CT. One night in the 1970s he and  his wife were covering a concert in Boston by the classical pianist, Artur  Rubinstein, who was then about 87. To their surprise, Rubinstein's goon picked  them out of the crowd of reporters and invited them into his dressing room for a  pre-concert interview. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]
 
[FONT=Trebuchet MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080]As they talked, Rubinstein  reached into the cabinet and pulled out a jug of Scotch, from which he poured a  large tumbler full to the brim. Then, like a linebacker quaffing Gatorade on the  bench, he sucked down the whole thing in one long gulp. He then went out and  electrified his audience for the next two hours.[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Trebuchet MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080]Alcohol affects different  people in different ways. This video clip is Rubinstein in his last recital in  London at the age of 89 with, assuming his routine went as usual, a good 10 or  12 ounces of Scotch under his belt:[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Trebuchet MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0BPLqxuj-bU[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Trebuchet MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080]Now I for one can't drink  without becoming desperately ill, and I sure as heck can't play the piano. But I  don't begrudge those who can, and I say that when a man can play like that at  89, he can drink anything and as much of it as he wants. Maybe those of us who  say there must be one measure for all are just being sorry for ourselves because  we can't. [/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[FONT=Trebuchet MS][SIZE=2][COLOR=#000080]I'll be happy to tell you my  recovery story, and I'll be glad to listen to yours. But under no circumstances  does "I did" necessarily imply that "You should." Yet for some strange reason we  alkies seem to have a mental block that prevents us from making that distinction  very clearly. Nevertheless, if the shoe fits...[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/QUOTE]
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5 years ago  ::  Jan 07, 2009 - 4:38PM #12
TepeyacHill
Posts: 70
Hi guys, I'm new to Beliefnet. This is my second post. I'm a recovered alcoholic from TX and have been a sober and active member of AA since May 5, 1994. While I agree that AA doesn't have an exclusive on methods of getting sober, I will say that there is only one AA way to do it and that way will work for anyone so-long as they're willing.  That's been my experience.

God bless all here.
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5 years ago  ::  Jan 07, 2009 - 5:41PM #13
smile-light
Posts: 3
Hi i agree willing and not taken the first drink, god-bless.
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5 years ago  ::  Jan 07, 2009 - 10:25PM #14
cherubino
Posts: 7,277
Yesterday I celebrated 20 years. I'm still in shock...
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5 years ago  ::  Jan 08, 2009 - 5:01AM #15
smile-light
Posts: 3
[QUOTE=cherubino;1004132]Yesterday I celebrated 20 years. I'm still in shock...[/QUOTE]
Thats brill 20years,, may you keep the good work and be kind to you,
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5 years ago  ::  Jan 08, 2009 - 5:07AM #16
smile-light
Posts: 3
[QUOTE=trudging;995247]Thats right but they're not in this book.

If all the God talk scares em away the booze will scare em back,
if they don't want what we have I hope they go find it soon because AA and the Big Book ain't changing.[/QUOTE]
The only way for me is the AA. also what you put into life you get back out of it,
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5 years ago  ::  Jan 08, 2009 - 2:07PM #17
mikeincolorado
Posts: 393
20 years ago that you'd wake up one day and be able to claim "I haven't had a drink in 20 years!"?

Happy Birthday, Cherubino.  If you can do it...;)

I do appreciate you and the experience you bring to the board - that and your willingness to referee when required. :D
Mike

*******************************************************
"When I've learned enough to really live, I'll be old enough to die" - Johnny Cash
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5 years ago  ::  Jan 08, 2009 - 2:29PM #18
mikeincolorado
Posts: 393

smile-light wrote:

The only way for me is the AA. also what you put into life you get back out of it,



Absolutely. I would share that AA has worked well for me, as well. When other approaches did not. However, that isn't always how things are presented.

Many come across with a spirit of "You must". Alcoholics can't be told. However, alcoholics will respond favorably to an approach where there is no authority. So, the question for me became "Do I want to be right and smart? A big-shot? Or do I want to help?" When Bill carried the message to Bob, he did it humbly, to save his own ass. The 6 months prior, with the alcoholics he approaches, he preaches, playing the big-shot, being smart and right. He has the answer, don'tcha know?

He stayed sober, but no one else did.

Once he changes his attitude, this AA thing gets created. Coincidence? Of course not.

Ultimately, this is about what works, what is most effective. The approach the book suggests isn't "I have the answer. My way or the highway. I'm the teacher, you're the student"

That the man who is making the approach has had the same difficulty, that he obviously knows what he is talking about, that his whole deportment shouts at the new prospect that he is a man with a real answer, that he has no attitude of Holier Than Thou, nothing whatever except the sincere desire to be helpful; that there are no fees to pay, no axes to grind, no people to please, no lectures to be endured these are the conditions we have found most effective.

Mike

*******************************************************
"When I've learned enough to really live, I'll be old enough to die" - Johnny Cash
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5 years ago  ::  Jan 08, 2009 - 4:38PM #19
Agnosticspirit
Posts: 9,253

cherubino wrote:

Yesterday I celebrated 20 years. I'm still in shock...



Happy Anniversary, Cherubic one! :)

((((( hugs )))))

---- agnosticspirit

Tribalism, ethnocentricism, racism, nationalism, and FEAR is the Mind Killer... >:(

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5 years ago  ::  Jan 08, 2009 - 4:38PM #20
Agnosticspirit
Posts: 9,253

cherubino wrote:

Yesterday I celebrated 20 years. I'm still in shock...



Happy Anniversary, Cherubic one! :)

((((( hugs )))))

---- agnosticspirit

Tribalism, ethnocentricism, racism, nationalism, and FEAR is the Mind Killer... >:(

For user to user support and to look up the latest glitch reports, check the Beliefnet Knowledgebase by clicking on the link below!

 Beliefnet Knowledgebase
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