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Switch to Forum Live View Former fatty now disgusted by fat folks
7 years ago  ::  Jan 31, 2008 - 3:50PM #1
RiverMoonlady
Posts: 773
Am I the only out there who thinks this way?

I lost a third of my body weight (went from 299 to 200) in the last few  years.  When I was fat, I was disgusted and ashamed of how I looked, both in private and in public.  I NEVER wore tight clothes, bathing suits, shorts or skirts/dresses shorter than mid-calf length, because I didn't want people to stare at me.

There were no magic pills, pre-made meals or diet plans.  I simply learned to eat healthy foods in appropriately-sized portions, and I did a lot of walking and exercising.

Now that I'm no longer fat (I'm over 5'-10" with a large frame), I feel a great deal of pure disdain and disgust when I see one of those fat people anywhere.  You know who I mean - the ones whose arms hang awkwardly at an angle because of their huge torsos, whose butts look like a sackful of fighting cats, who sway from side to side when they walk, whose bodies are clothed in tight stretch fabrics (usually in horrid colors), whose bellies stick way out in front with their breasts (female AND male) resting atop their guts.  Most of all, I hate to see them when they are eating - piled-up plates from the buffet line with mac and cheese, potato salad, various greasy meat dishes, sugary desserts - barely able to fit between their table and the back of their seats.

I know that a few may have have thyroid troubles or other medical conditions, but I also know that most simply refuse to eat right because it's too much work (can't get healthy food at the drive-thru) and don't exercise because "it hurts".

Does anyone else feel like this???  I know it's wrong, but I can't stop feeling pure disgust.
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7 years ago  ::  Jan 31, 2008 - 4:37PM #2
iczbez
Posts: 532
No I don't think that way. It's all about compassion. "By the grace of GOD there go I" Since you have been already been there you should understand. When I see someone with a weight issue, I think of them as my soul brother and sister because we share in somthing in common.
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7 years ago  ::  Feb 02, 2008 - 9:16PM #3
Gigi85
Posts: 1
This is a perfectly normal response and I assure you that you are not the only person that feels that way. It seems that once we have overcome something we become uncomfortable with people struggling with the issue we worked so hard to overcome. It's as though we feel disgust that they cannot do the same. It is not easy to be reminded of a time in which we strugled.

Perhaps you are feeling a fear that you may return to that place yourself?
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7 years ago  ::  Feb 02, 2008 - 9:44PM #4
Karma_yeshe_dorje
Posts: 12,478
RiverMoonlady:

Your BMI is 28.7; you are [COLOR="Red"]overweight[/COLOR]. Your gloating is misplaced; you still have a long way to go to reach normal weight. I think this is just another example of denial.
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7 years ago  ::  Feb 04, 2008 - 9:07AM #5
IreneAdler
Posts: 2,849
It’s often said “there’s nothing worse that a reformed smoker” as they are out to end all smoking.  Maybe a similar thing can be said for those who lose weight. **shrug**

I too have lost a large amount of weight (well over 100 lbs) and have encountered feelings and thoughts that surprised me.  Don’t think it’s distain for those who are morbidly obese; more like sadness.  I wish I could help with their struggle to lose weight. I know for me the extra weight hid a lot of hurt feelings. But here I assume that such folks want to drop pounds and that they are having emotional eating issues. Maybe they do and maybe they don’t.  Could be such persons are perfectly happy just as they are (and good for them when this is true!).  It’s a lesson in accepting and loving people exactly as they are. After all, who am I to judge others?

I watched my sis gain weight (she’s pushing 275-300 lbs) and I want to stop her from her poor food choices. But I can’t.  She has to learn this for her self.  So I hold my tongue.  She does the crash dieting stuff- drops 100+ lbs and puts it right back on.  Each time she says “This is it! I’m not gonna regain the weight!” Yet she never changes her eating habits once she completes the crash diet.  So the pounds return. Can’t tell her what she’s doing incorrectly; she won’t listen.  She needs to learn this by herself. Hard to watch.

Irene.
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7 years ago  ::  Feb 05, 2008 - 3:28PM #6
RiverMoonlady
Posts: 773
You all (except KYD) have good points.  Yes, I fear being fat again - but I've changed my entire lifestyle so that it shouldn't happen.  I do fear for my sister - she is about 5 in. shorter than me and weighs more - and keeps getting heavier.  But then again, she has a desk job and eats the wrong things.

I guess I feel that since it was so easy for me (meaning I WANTED to change badly enough), that others who really want to lose weight should be able to but they're just lazy or something.  I'm just glad to know that I'm not alone in my feelings.  I have compassion for fat people (after all, I was one) but it's not considered polite to go up to a fat person and tell them how to lose weight!

KYD - If I lost 100 lbs, another 30 (to get me to "normal" weight) shouldn't be too hard.  After all, I weighed 170 at the end of 9-1/2 months of chemotherapy almost five years ago.  Unfortunately, at that weight I looked way too bony - so maybe 180 is a better goal.  Besides, "overweight" is a lot better than "grossly obese", doncha think?
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7 years ago  ::  Feb 05, 2008 - 3:51PM #7
IreneAdler
Posts: 2,849
Losing weight was "easy"?  I'm glad that someone finds this to be the case.

As for me, it's a daily struggle. Always has been. Yes, I plan all meals and portion out my foods. But temptation dogs me regularly. And  there are times when I would like to just "pig out".  And many days where I just don't feel like I've had enough food.   Frustrating. Makes me cry too.

RE: your sister.  You know exactly what I'm going through.

Irene.
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7 years ago  ::  Feb 06, 2008 - 5:01PM #8
RiverMoonlady
Posts: 773
Losing weight was easy - eating right and exercising was the hard part!  Actually, after going without sweets, fatty foods, etc. for a month, I lost my taste for them.  I still eat some "bad things" now and then, but only once a week or so instead of fulltime.  I used to binge on mini peanut butter cups - now I can't even eat ONE.  It's amazing what your body will do when you put your mind in charge.

I originally had TWO reasons to change my lifestyle - weight and the aftereffects of cancer treatment.  Part of my immune system was surgically removed, so I researched the foods that directly affect immunity.  Lucky for me, those are the same foods that help with weight loss.  Also, after being bedridden for months, I had to build my body back up.  At first, when my appetite returned, I went overboard and that's how I ended up fat again.  Now I go overboard with veggies instead of McDonald's and lunch meat.

I am so lucky that I have excellent heart health and no family history of diabetes (only cancer.)  I believe that my new lifestyle should help prevent a recurrence of cancer, so heathy weight is really only a part of the outcome.  I wish you luck with your situation and your sister's.
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7 years ago  ::  Feb 06, 2008 - 5:43PM #9
Karma_yeshe_dorje
Posts: 12,478
RiverMoonlady:

[QUOTE]at that weight I looked way too bony[/QUOTE]You are concerned with appearance.
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7 years ago  ::  Feb 06, 2008 - 8:36PM #10
giertruidis
Posts: 206
Ok so you had a huge motivator to help you.  Maybe if your sister had a "gun" like that held at her head she would do it as "easily" as you did.
There was a time when exercise came easily to me too, if I didn't go running in the morning and move the blood I would get a huge headache - sort of like - "workout or I hit you with a hammer" motivation.
People over eat for many reasons, your disdain and disgust wouldn't help them anyway.  The worst reason to change is for what other people think of you.
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