Hey Guys, I am going to make a long story short..my mom has been an alcoholic for approx 30+yrs..she is what you would call a functioning alcoholic..one that still takes care of business, keeps the house clean, herself looking good, cooks, bills paid..however no matter how hard she tries to portray things as being normal...dysfunction still is apparent...recent case in point..complains in detail to me about helping to raise one of my siblings children..complains of being excessively tired and worn-out and wishes that my sister would take over raising her own child..by the way my sister is in the Navy and her and my mother agreed to no more than 4-5 yrs. whatever..my mom is almost 70..I feel she said yes for reasons of guilt, greed $, and  her mind said "YES I CAN" but her body is saying "NO I CANT"..says I wound'nt understand because I'm not there..blah, blah, blah...Fast Forward..approx 3-4wks..Suddenly she cannot remember that conversation..She tires to flip the script..and says she never said it, and that I am the one who was accusing the other sibiling of wrong doing..tries to cast blame on me for her last vacation hm, being stressful..says that when at my home, I stressed her out..when in reality, I confronted her because I caught her playing me against YET ANOTHER SISTER..saying negative things about me while at my home talking to my sister on the phone..I caught her like a kid with their hand in the cookie jar..one of the few times I've seen my mother totally speechless..but now of course it never happened..and she didnt do anything wrong...URRGH!!! I'M FUSTRATED AND PISSED OFF..can anyone relate to this..Deniese

Mar 5, 2009 -- 6:09PM, In_passing wrote:

Most places have support groups for family members of alcoholics.  Al-Anon comes to mind here, but there are probably others of the same sort.  It might be worth checking the community support section of the local phone book, or asking a few questions about support groups at the local health clinic.

I don't know it this suggestion will be of any interest to you, but I just thought I would mention it.

Al-anon helped me SOOO much.  I cannot recommend them enough.  And there are groups everywhere.  Check them out.  :)

Hello Deniese,

I can totally relate to what you are going through. My mother was an Achcholic. With me being the oldest out of four, I have many, many good memories of my mother along with many many bad ones. She passed away at the Age of 50 in 1991 from a second heart attack.

My sister, and youngest brother have hardly any good memories of her. My oldest brother just as buried it all deep within himself.

I also could write all day on all my good and bad memories. I have a journal now, recommened by my counselor one with the bad memories and one with the good ones.

It took me several years after her passing to deal with all that she put me through. Verbal and phsyical abuse. I had to deal with it when I started having horrible nightmares about her. It also took me a long time to realize and accept the fact the acholism is a disease.

I have been diagnosed with PDSD, because of such and am dealing with it much better since I started writing and accepting the fact that she had this disease.

Well, I could go on and on. I am here if you would like to discuss any thing more about details of what you have been through.

My email addrress is tccdawson@yahoo.com