|8 years ago :: Jun 30, 2009 - 8:45PM #1|
I'm a young adult, and for a long time I've been skeptical about liturgical Christianity, preferring a kind've pseudo-Protestant "spiritual" belief system, while taking what I like from Orthodoxy and Catholicism.
After reading a few Catholic and Orthodox books about/on the Christian mystical tradition, I've really drawn much closer to a desire to be baptized and live a Eucharistic life, which just 7 years ago I would've thought insane. I have come to appreciate more the idea of the Church as the Lord's mystical body, part militant and part triumphant.
There is still one major stumbling block I have, and you'll forgive me if it seems small and irrelevent, but it means a lot to me. I understand that in the history of Christendom, at least in the west, the idea of salvation in and through the Church and Eucharist was used as a weapon of power. The Pope could even wield it against princes and higher authorities in governments as desired.
I'm not sure if this phenomenon occurred in the Orthodox East, but in any case, I've always had a problem understanding how the bureaucratic aspect of the Church really fit in with the "body of Christ" part. Becaue obviously the body of Christ is holy. I do believe in the "self evident" truths delineated in the Declaration of Independence, however, and cannot help but find my faith shaken in the whole concept if the Church actually endorses this idea of salvation for obedience to the Church bureaucracy.
Any thoughts to help me on my way are greatly appreciated, and I pray to accept them in the same Christian charity in which I'd hope they are given.