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Switch to Forum Live View Question about Being Judgemental
4 years ago  ::  Jan 19, 2011 - 11:13AM #1
Phyllizz
Posts: 126

I am trying to figure out exactly what is judging others. For ex: one of my friend called me and asked that I don't forget to watch the Golden Globes so we can discuss it. This friend particularly likes to discuss how the celebrities look and act. Is this being judgmental or just offering opinions? Thanks in advance.

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4 years ago  ::  Jan 19, 2011 - 6:16PM #2
Myownpath
Posts: 947

Let me ask you to think about something. Say your friend asked to to visit an art exhibit so that you can then talk about it later. How would the conversation about the exhibit be different than the discussion about the people's looks and actions at the Golden Globe.


Can you ever see a situation in which you are never judgemental? Name it. 


Here is my view, you can never avoid making a judgement. Never. You are always judging something good, bad, right, wrong, etc. The best you can hope for is to be discerning. Seeing a situation and deciding whether it will work for you or not without any disparagement views about the other individual or feelings of inferiority or superiority.

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4 years ago  ::  Jan 20, 2011 - 11:45AM #3
Phyllizz
Posts: 126

Thank you for that comparison about the art exihibit. It's really making me think about it. What about comedians who make fun of people or are self-deprecating? Is that being negative?

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4 years ago  ::  Jan 22, 2011 - 4:27PM #4
Myownpath
Posts: 947

Are they being judgemental? - of course - as I stated above even a compliment involves making a judgement about someone. Is negative criticism the most loving choice we could make?? Probably not. Usually negative personal criticism toward someone else reflects the criticizer's mental state more than the person being criticized. You cannot control the other person, but you can control your perception of the incident.


At times, I feel that criticism is warranted and can be proactive. Imagine a comedian criticizing a public place or architect because she and a group of women had to take over the men's restroom during a break at a concert. It certainly brings poor planning to the forefront of our awareness. In this case, the criticism relates to a person's action rather than personally calling the architect and planners idiots. There is a difference in intention.

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