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6 years ago  ::  May 16, 2008 - 2:18AM #21
Redfrog777
Posts: 2,136
Just tell them the truth. If they don't accept you then it is best that you move on. If you fudge it a little bit you ain't really giving them a honest chance to accept you or not. Also if you fudge it and then some how the truth comes to light, now you look like a dork.

I don't know I hope it works out. I am kinda pissy when it comes to things like this. I don't give a crap what others think of me. I try not to step on to many toes. But here I am love it or leave it. Rough edges and every thing.
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6 years ago  ::  May 16, 2008 - 12:17AM #22
Sercher
Posts: 30
And therein lies the fear.  I think they know I'm not Catholic, and I can always claim to be Unitarian.

I adore them, they are good people. I don't want to mess this up.
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6 years ago  ::  May 16, 2008 - 2:18AM #23
Redfrog777
Posts: 2,136
Just tell them the truth. If they don't accept you then it is best that you move on. If you fudge it a little bit you ain't really giving them a honest chance to accept you or not. Also if you fudge it and then some how the truth comes to light, now you look like a dork.

I don't know I hope it works out. I am kinda pissy when it comes to things like this. I don't give a crap what others think of me. I try not to step on to many toes. But here I am love it or leave it. Rough edges and every thing.
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6 years ago  ::  May 16, 2008 - 4:04AM #24
Embersfire
Posts: 68
What does your b/f think? He obviously knows these people better than you, how does he think they will react? Should you get married, how much time will you be spending with them? Some of them might accept your choice of religion to be your affair, but others might be harder to get along with. Would it be ok to trust some of them and hope they won't let it slip to others in the family? Good luck with this, but its a bit of a tough one.
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6 years ago  ::  May 16, 2008 - 4:21AM #25
lexa_blue
Posts: 327
So, after a heartbreaking end to a relationship in August, I am finally back out there, going on dates.  I'm just starting to date a wonderful man....and it's time for the "disclaimer" part of the getting-together process.  We both really like each other, but we haven't talked about "life's persistant questions" yet--so thanks to everyone for the replies on this thread; it helps a lot to know that I'm not the only one struggling with this.

We met each other as single Jews.  Yes, I'm Jewish, but I'm also Pagan--and Unitarian Universalist.  He knows that I'm religious, but I just haven't figured out how to bring up Paganism.  How have you all done it?  Are there any wonderful success stories out there?  Sercher, SG, it's gone well for you, right?  I'm not at all ashamed of my beliefs, but I can't help being nervous about it.  I'm also severely mentally ill, which is another thing he needs to know.  I'm in treatment and under control, but I still feel the need to tell him all the things that make me less than "normal."

I know that it's up to me, but I could certainly use some support.  And as I said, this thread is wonderful.:)

Blessings,
Lexa (who is back on b-net:D)
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6 years ago  ::  May 16, 2008 - 9:25AM #26
Redfrog777
Posts: 2,136
Hey Lexa,

Blessings on your new relationship.

As a guy, I might suggest that you go slow and easy with what you revieal to your new boyfriend. I mean you have to tell him, just don’t tell him everything all at once. That might freak him out and send him packing. I also know that if he really cares for you? As long as you are honest and open with him he will be accepting of who your are. 

I would allow him to gat to know you really well before I went in to the mental illness. If he see’s you healthy and functioning then it won’t seen so much as a problem. I also might let this one take it’s own time to come out. Small bites are easer to chew.

Guys are really pretty easy to figure out. There is really only two things on our minds at any one time. The first is sex and the 2ed thing I forget. Feed me and I’ll be happy. Remember that as a rule I am just as emotional as you, I just might not know how to deal with it.

Good luck Lexa. I hope it works for you.
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6 years ago  ::  May 19, 2008 - 9:39AM #27
Karma_yeshe_dorje
Posts: 12,451
Paganism I understand--relationships I don't!

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6 years ago  ::  May 19, 2008 - 2:01PM #28
Sacrificialgoddess
Posts: 9,496

lexa_blue wrote:

So, after a heartbreaking end to a relationship in August, I am finally back out there, going on dates.  I'm just starting to date a wonderful man....and it's time for the "disclaimer" part of the getting-together process.  We both really like each other, but we haven't talked about "life's persistant questions" yet--so thanks to everyone for the replies on this thread; it helps a lot to know that I'm not the only one struggling with this.

We met each other as single Jews.  Yes, I'm Jewish, but I'm also Pagan--and Unitarian Universalist.  He knows that I'm religious, but I just haven't figured out how to bring up Paganism.  How have you all done it?  Are there any wonderful success stories out there?  Sercher, SG, it's gone well for you, right?  I'm not at all ashamed of my beliefs, but I can't help being nervous about it.  I'm also severely mentally ill, which is another thing he needs to know.  I'm in treatment and under control, but I still feel the need to tell him all the things that make me less than "normal."

I know that it's up to me, but I could certainly use some support.  And as I said, this thread is wonderful.:)

Blessings,
Lexa (who is back on b-net:D)



Welcome back, Lexa! 

I married a Deist, so I don't know to much about dating pagans.  You would have to ask him!  :p

Dark Energy. It can be found in the observable Universe. Found in ratios of 75% more than any other substance. Dark Energy. It can be found in religious extremists, in cheerleaders. To come to the conclusion that Dark signifies mean and malevolent would define 75% of the Universe as an evil force. Alternatively, to think that some cheerleaders don't have razors in their snatch is to be foolishly unarmed.

-- Tori Amos
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