Asalamu Aleikum,
I know what you mean...sometimes I miss my soon-to-be ex. But I surely don't miss all the problems! I don't know any good support groups for Muslims. I've not been able to find any, either locally, or on-line that seemed above board and well run.However, if you think we might be able to support each other, please do send me a message.

as for the twilight zone. I've been attending some counseling to help me handle the PTSD iIseem to have developed. It seems that the holding on, the "what if" and "maybe" feelings are quite normal, but are more artifacts of the trauma of the marraige than of the divorce. The counselor had some good suggestions that 've found to be very helpful. They are:

Stay busy- if you have to scrub walls at home to have something physical to do..do so.

If you've been avoiding going somewhere or doing something because of its assocaition with your ex, go there and do whatever it is enough times that you convince yourself that it ok to do.

You've already let go of some of your personal power as part of the marriage because it wasn't good for you, therefore you've already served your time (in my case almost 30 years) and that's longer than most prison time done for someone who has comitted murder! let your self  go free.

Aviod negative thinking. If you feel unsure about a situation or your feeling are leading you away from what your head knows is good, then slow done a listen carefully to your self talk. What are you thinking that brings on the feelings? Areyou  thinking there's something you can't or shouldn't do? I've found that if I look hard at what I'm thinking its usually something negative about my own ablilites (again a leftover from an abusive situation) and once i understand the feeling it goes away.

I've done a couple of other things that have helped me a lot, as suggested by friends.

1. I ask Allah each evening to forgive me for any trespasses i've committed each day, including those I've done to myself as well as things I've done to others. This is a separate dua'a for me.
2. Everytime I think of my ex, and realize I'm doing it, I stop and ask Allah to help me replace those thot's with thot's of Him. Works really well and I've really cut down on thinking about my ex .
3. I made a mental list of all the important events in my life and in the lives of my children and considered exactly what my ex had contributed to the positive side of those events. It was a really small amount and for most of those events I couldn't find a positive contribution. I review the list when I'm feeling weak.

I hope you are feeling better today. I have to go back to court today to appeal for my daughter's protection order..it will be a hard day. But I have a dear friedn who says  she is going to be praying so hard for me, that my ex will be sitting in his own sweat. The mental image really helped!

One of my kids said the other day that they tho't their dad should have a warning label, because what he did to us he would do to others. She was imagining that he had a lamp cord (like a tail) with one of those white warning tags on it. I confess that the mental image I had was of  one of those smoking warnings plaserted down the front of his suit.  If your ex is having problems getting over the divorce, he's not ready to move on to someone else. He'll hurt them also. maybe you could think of him with a warning label!

Asalamu Aleikum,
just checking in to see how you are feeling Sister Nadia. Is all well?