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Switch to Forum Live View 38 yr marriage almost ended
5 years ago  ::  Aug 02, 2013 - 1:34PM #1
Posts: 1
Hello my fellow christians, I am asking for prayers and advice on my situation in my marriage.My husband left me in May 2013 and then filed divorce and ignored me treated me so bad that it actually almost threw me into a nervous breakdown. Things have improved but there are still issues I have been asking my Lord Jesus to help me with. I found out he had an affair with a 32 yr old women and he is 59 we have been married for 38 yrs this last July. The women he had the affair with died in March and I believe this affair was not a long time fling but I do know my husband thinks this woman was some sort of angel from the Lord and he is now carrying pictures of her in his wallet and has pictures in his truck and who knows where else he has them. He did stop the divorce and told me he is mixxed up and needs time, my problem is this that this young woman never really cared for my husband to begin with she was using him to get different things to take care of her habits and he does not want to see this although in the past he has admitted what she was all about. I feel him having the pictures like he does is idolizing her and he has yet to ask me for forgiveness for what he has done. He is not living with me at the time and refuses to let me visit him since this all happened I have seen him once and I feel the time I did have with him that day was very beneficial to getting our marriage back on track where it belongs. But he will not allow me to see him at this time. I have been praying everyday for the Lord to guide his heart back to me and for him to see what he has done was wrong and to also make him see that having pictures of her everywhere and not caring whether it bothers me or not is wrong and hurts me so very much. So I guess I am just asking for prayers and advice to get him to realize what he is doing is wrong. He is a God fearing man and before this woman came into his life he was a wonderful loving caring husband and human being, but now he has done things that makes me look at him and say to myself I don't know this man. I love him very much and want to have my life with him back and I want so very much to trust him like I did and for him to put me first in his life like he always done before this woman influenced him and changed my husband's morals and thoughts. Thank you for reading this and all prayers and advice is truly welcome.
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5 years ago  ::  Aug 02, 2013 - 3:38PM #2
Posts: 16,577

First, I am so sorry.  It feels like someone reached into your chest and pulled your beating heart out.

I remember praying that God would bring my husband around too.  I was praying the Lord's prayer and I got to "thy will be done" and I realized I was trying to impose my will on God.  I tried very hard to change my own heart to "thy will be done" and trust that if God had it in mind for me to be single, it would be OK.  As it happened for me, within a few hours my husband called and wanted to come home. That was almost 31 years ago. 

At this point, I don't think you have much choice but to trust God.  Even Jesus in the garden wasn't happy with God's choice for him at the time. However, if you can really let go and trust God in this, you will be happier in the long run.


Good luck and peace!

I know you believe you understand what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize what you heard was not what I meant...
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5 years ago  ::  Aug 03, 2013 - 12:25PM #3
Posts: 9,223

Pardon me for saying this I know this may sound rude and I want to be very sensitive here but he is not worth all your getting upset for your worth way much more then that! God loves you but Im so sick of these older men who wants affairs, Ive got profiles up at 2 different dating sights on the net and they approach me all the time older Christian married men its make me sick Im so sick of it.


Im sorry I just had to say it. Sometimes I think Id be better of just being happy to stay single myself and maybe you would be too let men have their own world their not worth it............

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