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    Saturday, September 6, 2008, 3:35 PM [General]

    Well we made it through ok.  We never lost power though some others did.  I tried to clean up the yard but the winds hadn't stopped enough to quit knocking bits out of the trees.  But I got much done.  I'm not going to do any laundry yet.  Let the septic drain if it has to.  And I'm not about to find out the hard way.  I brought in a large tree branch in for the kittens.  They and the branch are on the table.  They're in their own little woods complete with food and water.  The dog rather enjoyed chewing on the larger limbs.

    Now it's just muggy and rather warm, but I don't want to shut the doors. Clouds come and go still in the swirling motion hurricanes do, even though Hanna was a TS.  Next is Ike. Good luck Fla., and Cuba.

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    Tuesday, August 12, 2008, 8:42 PM [General]

    You lost your little unborn "meat loaf" on Sunday.  I called the pre-born "meat loaf" with affection. But for whatever reason the pre-born baby died and Will is devastated. I asked the Universe (or whomever) to send a shaman to talk with my son.  Just today a pastor my son works with spoke with him about his loss.  Pastors and shamans are similar enough.  I may not have agreed with everthing the man said but if my son was in any way comforted that is all that matters! 
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    Tuesday, April 1, 2008, 8:49 PM [General]

    My son got married today. Quiet ceremony with strangers attending. My son, his fiance, a girl we asked to be the other witness (Thanks Courthouse Cafe) two people visiting with the magistrate and someone in the hall waitng to enter the office. There is something so cool about that. We all clapped when the groom kissed his bride. And I hugged my new daughter. I have two now. And we made a new friend. 

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    Monday, March 24, 2008, 11:01 PM [General]

    The viewing went well. Mom was dressed in her black galabay with the silver trim. The Egypt sand and Egypt water were with her. My boss came to the viewing, too. That was nice. She chose not to come to the food fight. She had to go back to work.  We ate and laughed, chuckled and reminisced of times past. And had our food fight. 


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    Mom, this is for you.

    Sunday, March 23, 2008, 12:54 PM [General]

    Pay attention. We are going to have a mini-funeral for you. Now, now, just listen. There are a few in the family who want to say good bye. So they are going to come and do that. Then we will have a party, celebrate your life and have a food fight! But if butter starts flying around of its own accord I'm outa there. lol not really. we hope, if you're able, stop by. We invite you to your party, Mom.
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    elephant tricks

    Sunday, March 23, 2008, 10:52 AM [General]

    Elephant who was so violent had turned to a peaceful creature in the wee hours of the new day. The elephant allowed my mother to die peacefully.
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    Mom's agenda

    Sunday, March 23, 2008, 10:50 AM [General]

    She had no intention, whatsoever, of going into a nursing home, and by golly she didn't. She gave us all the raspberry and died in her bed peacefully. 3/23/08 3:30 AM
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    One's ness

    Saturday, March 22, 2008, 6:19 PM [General]

    As I sat in Mom's bedroom watching her struggle for her next breath I thought of the body's tenatiousness yes tenacity tenatiousness to cling to life ever though she may be gone. Her eyebrows were quite active. And I wondered if her mind was active. Was she still in there? She's getting morphine every hour and a liquid for the sake of simplicity we called liquid xanax. So there is no waking her. But she does register pain. Break thru pain. So she must be. But where? How far away? I told her I loved her and she may have mumbled it back during lucid-ish moment that was fleeting. She hasn't had a truly lucid moment since 3AM Friday morning. Just yesterday.

    We've told her to go if she wishes. Love you Mom.

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    good friday

    Friday, March 21, 2008, 12:17 PM [General]

    My family's good friday is, as my brother said, anything but good. We are putting mom in a nursing home because she is dying. Maybe nursing home is a misnomer. We are putting her in a pre-death home. A pre-death home where the attendants are the ministering angels.

    Good Friday is a day that seems to have been set apart to look at death. This day moreso than any other. The elephant that is refused to be talked about. But elephants are generally gentle creatures which I imagine we all hope for a gentle death. But at other times elephants can be extremely violent taking everything in their paths as they crash the surrounding areas. And there is the elephant that is in our own body when we die. It may be a peaceful elephant or the violent one.

    My mother named herself the Ol' Barracuda and that fish is extremely dangerous. But the elephant within her is not a peaceful creature. It is the elephant that ravages the landscape, bending and twisting the cells in her body to form grotesque tumors in her lungs and her brain. This is my new mother. She still retains the stubborness of her barracuda nickname but her elephant is not one I'm familiar with. This elephant was accepted by my mother in that she chose to forgo any cancer treatments. There the barracuda won out. My old and new mother is not a coward. My mother has Ovaries!

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    Sunny and cold

    Sunday, March 9, 2008, 1:14 PM [General]

    outside my livingroom window is a sprawling bush that still has berries. Small purplish-blue berries. And in that bush/tree is a nice fat robin getting ready for its trip north. His back is facing the sun acting like a solar panel. My kitty is trilling at the bird.  Last year on a particlar day that bush was full of cedar waxwings. Their feathers appear to be velvet. Beautiful birds.
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