I am so glad that I have faith in God. In times when I could not feel or see that I had any faith, I knew it was there.  Faith is what has caused me to stretch and grow during times when my life has been challenging.  Faith came from the inner most core of who I am. 

I remember sitting one day at my kitchen window and wanting to die.  I saw no way out of the challenge I was facing and thought dying would be way less painful than going through what I felt I was going to face.  I felt so guilty that I felt the way I did, because I had two 13 year old children sitting on either side of me that I was responsible for rearing.  I struggled for days with "just wanting to die".  I shared my feelings with my counselor and he knew that I was not going to kill myself.  He knew that I was just extremely sad and shocked over my current situation. 

However, even in those darkest moments I still had faith.  I had faith that God knew what he was doing, because that faith was way deep inside me.  It had been planted years ago and had been watered and fertilized by going to church and listening to God's word and reading His words.  I admit that it wasn't an easy time of my life.  I admit that it is not somewhere I want to go back to and stay, but it is a place in my mind that I compare with where I am today.

My faith in God is the only thing that brought me through those darkest days.  He put individuals, scripture and various other things in my path each day to get me through the day and to where I am today.

Shall we accept good from God and not trouble?  Job 2:10 (NIV)

Where does faith come from?  I never really sat and thought about where faith comes from.  Is it something we are born with like the color of our eyes or is it something that we aquire like we assests?

As I was leaving my mother's house this evening after dropping off my son to spend the night.  I looked at my phone and saw that I had a text message.  So while I was sitting in the driveway, I throught I would see who it was from.  It was my daily Bible Verse that comes via text.  I was a little surprised that I hadn't read it earlier in the day, but I had been busy all day. 

I began to read the words...Consequently, faith comes from hearing the message, and the message is heard through the word of Christ.  Roman 10:17.  Very quickly I thought of why I have faith and where it came from.  My mother took me to church each Sunday and Wednesday and any other time the door was open to hear the message through the word of Christ.  How fortunate I was to have a mother that taught me to read my Bible and go to Church so that I could be exposed to the words in the Bible, because I am now sure it lead to me having the faith that I have today.  Thank you God for my mother who was there to take me to listen to your word and who taught me to read your word. 

I wouldn't know how to find my way without my faith.

I had written a blog earlier today about sharing my faith. Unfortunately, I didn't save the blog while I went off searching for a Bible Verse to go with the writings.  Instead of getting really upset with myself, I decided to use this as another experience to write about today.

At one time in my life I would not have been able to move on.  I would not have been able to take the lemon and gather up all the ingredients for the lemonade so quickly.   Loosing something would have sent me into a panic.  I would have allowed it to ruin a portion, if not all of my day.  However, not today. It was different today.

Yes, I was a little upset that my words were forever gone, but it allowed me to write new words about my faith and how God works in my life.  I had experienced something else to share with others.  Learning to take what is given to you right this very minute and doing the best you can with it today.  

I am convienced that God is walking with me every step of the way.  Even when I loose my words or thoughts.  When something like this happens, it gives God an opportunity to provide me with new words and new experiences to share with others.

I simply keep on believing that his way is much better than mine!

Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.” – Proverbs 3:5-6 KJV

Have you ever ask God "Where do you want me to go?"  When you ask him that question are you ready for his answer?

I am embarking on a new world.  Where I am today is not exactly where I thought I would be at this time in my life.  However, I do have the faith that this is exactly where God wants me to be in my world.

At one time in my life, I actually thought a lot of negative things abouts who I was.  I was too old to learn, I was too slow in the mind to go back to work.  However, I put all my life in God's hands and things began to change. I returned to school to finish a degree I started twenty years ago (before marriage and children) and I finished that degree this spring.  I actually made decent grades.  It wasn't easy going back with children to care for and the circumstances within our home, but it happened.  Now, I am going back to work outside the home.  A thought that once gave me very uneasy feelings. Now, there is excitement about meeting new people that I know God has put in my path on purpose to help me grow even more.

I had faith that he would guide me where I needed to be, and where he wanted me to be in this world.  When I felt like giving up and I felt very overwhelmed,  I would  visualized that I was putting everything in his hand.

I held onto one of my favorite Bible Verses, of all times, that has guided me over the years.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  Jerimiah 29:11(NIV)

As I read something tonight that was written by Joel Osteen I became relieved.  The last 24 hours had not been very pleasant for me.  The verse he quoted was Matthew 21:21...If you have faith.  Yes, God I have faith.  However, for several reasons I have been worrying recently.  Does that mean I don't have faith?  No, I do but I really need your help God to continue to find my way through the darkness that sometimes comes down and smothers me and chokes me and tries to defeat me.  It creeps into my world when I least expect it.

After reading the words Joel wrote "we've all had seasons when the challenges of life seem overwhelming".  Oh, that is so true for me right now.  Joel mentioned how we sometimes talk about how bad things are when it would be better to think and talk about how blessed we are.  Do you think it was coincidence that I received this message from him via email tonight?  I don't think so.  I think God used Joel to send this message not only to me but to others out there who are facing challenges and needed a reminder that God is with us when we face "our mountains".  The Bible Verse he used reminded me when you ask God to please help... he does.  It is as simple as asking and having faith that he will move whatever mountain you are facing. 

And Jesus answered them,  Truly I say to you, if you have faith (a firm relying trust) and do not doubt, you will not only do what has been done to the fig tree, but even if you say to this moutain, Be taken up and cast into the sea, it will be done.  Matthew 21:21 AMP)

Are you certain of something when you can not see it?  What makes you arrive at that certainity? 

I receive a daily Bible verse from a local radio station by text.  I am very anxious to see what they send me each day.  I say they, because I know that there is someone at that station or someone somewhere that is going  to send me the verse each day.  I don't know them, I have never seen them, but what I do know is that the verse comes each day. I have faith in something arriving each day to guide me.  I have faith that someone that I have never seen is going to send the text.  I have faith that through them God is sending me the words that I need to hear specifically that day and carry with me throughout the day. 

Recently, I had to sign up again in order to keep receiving the text message.  I'm not sure why after two years I needed to sign up again, but I did what was instructed. I had faith that if I signed up again I would continue to get my much needed Bible Verse of the day.  I wanted to continue to keep receiving God's word to me each day where I could carry it with me physically and mentally.  Today, I am thinking that the signing up again to get the Bible Verse texted to me is like recommitting to God.  Sometimes we have to do the recommitting to God in order to be able to carrying his word with us daily.

As I picked up my phone today I looked for the verse and it was "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.  (Hebrews 11:1)

If I ever needed those words, I needed to hear them today.  Am I certain that God is out there even though I can't see him?  YES, I AM!!!  Are you?

My blog today is only because I went to church on Sunday.  I am really glad I chose to go because my Pastor gave a wonderful demonstration of faith in God.  He began by asking how many of us could play the guitar.  Then he ask how many of us would like to learn to play the guitar.  His final question was "Would someone come up here and play the guitar while we sing a song?"  There wasn't anyone moving.  I found myself clinging to my chair and very happy I was on the back row instead of the front row! 

After what seemed to be eternity, a young female child walked bravely on the stage with the Pastor and he handed her the guitar to put around her neck.  He then told her to play as we sung the song.  She strummed the guitar as we started to sing.  It sounded horrible of course.  Then the Pastor turned to her and said here is a pick and you play the bottom part and I will take care of top part and together we will make the music for the closing song.  So, the young lady of no more than 12 years of age, trusted him to do what he said and she began to strum the strings with the pick.  My Pastor put his hands on the strings at the top to play the cords.  Together there was wonderful music. 

This is how God is with us when we have faith.  He plays the cords in order to make it work for our best, to give us the best sound, the best music in our lives.  The young lady could have refused the Pastors help and kept on playing music that was off key or she could have walked off the stage and given up because the music she made by herself was off-key.  She could have been angry or hurt and lashed out at the Pastor.  However, she stayed on stage and trusted our Pastor to help her make the music sound fantastic.  She had faith when she walked on that stage in front of at least 200 people and she had faith when she put the guitar around her neck.  She had faith when she started playing without any help, and she had faith when he told her that he would help her.  Faith was demonstrated to me on Sunday.  I think the vision of me strumming the guitar while allowing God to play the cords gave me a good way to always remember to have faith in him and not give up whatever the circumstance.

Then Jesus answered, "Woman, you have great faith! Your request is granted."  And her daughter was healed from that very hour.  Matthew 15:28

I went around all day trying to come up with something that was evident in my world that would WOW someone about faith.  As my daughter sat across from me reading a book, I ask her, "what does faith mean?".  She looked up at me with a look of everyone knows what faith means mom, but proceeded to tell me her version anyway.  "Faith is believing in something that you can't see", she said very matter-of-factly, gave me a puzzled look and went back to her readidng.  I agreed with her, but remember I was searching for a definition that would WOW people.  Then it came to me that Faith is very simple.  It is simply believing that God is with you throughout all the good and bad times in your life.  Faith is knowing that you can go ahead and give your tithe when you don't have a lot of money and that you will be blessed.  It is knowing that he is working behind the scenes in your world.  Faith is believing that the sun is continuing to shine above the black clouds hanging over you. And it is believing that there will be calmness after the heavy winds have disrupted your world.  Faith is knowing in your heart that God is walking with you every day.

When I sat down very early one morning last week at my kitchen table to make an entry in my journal, I glanced to my side and out in front of me. Immediately, I noticed that the water was very reflective of the trees and houses across the water from me.  As I looked closer, the water was sparkling, as if there were diamonds floating on top.  The sky was full of light.  It was a pale blue sky with no clouds.  A smile automatically came to my face because of the beauty I witnessed from this window. This reminded me of one of the reason why I love living on the water.   Peace and joy come to me when I look out at the beauty there is in the water and the sky. 

For some reason I turned around in my chair and looked out the window behind me. The water was not sparkling. The water was in fact dull, the reflections across the water were not as clear. When I looked at the he sky it was not as bright and there were clouds.  Immediately, the thoughts entered my head that God walks beside us shining light ahead for us and therefore we have light to see as we move forward into the future.  The past is behind you was my next thought.  My thoughts continued to flow.  We are finished with that part of our life so we don't need the bright light on it as much as we do what is in front of us flowed from my fingertips onto the screen in front of me.  Being where I am personally in my life, alot of thoughts came to my mind about this light situation outside my kitchen windows. 

I immediately thought of my two children that were ending their 8th grade year in the school they had been attending for the last nine years.  These were significant words for them as they start out in a new world, beginning their high school career.  All the many years behind them remains important, but what is more important is from this day forward.  It also gave me hope about their future world.  This beauty gave me peace that God will be with them, guiding them as they move throughout their world. 

This beautiful picture God sent to me this morning gave me a very unique and precious gift to give them.  I had actually been concerned about what I could give them that would make a significant difference in their world for their 8th grade graduation.  With this insight from God that came to me as I sat down to write about my feelings, I now had the precious gift to give them.  I was excited about the opportunity to give them thoughts that came from God for their graduation.  I realize this scene of beauty was sent by God in order for me to share this with my children as they are now moving on in their world. 

I truly was concerned about what I was going to give them because we don't have a lot of money to spend, but this gift was free.  I can't describe the excitment I had inside me as I wrote a letter to my children about this very priceless experience I had been given by an early morning rising. This was an experience that I could share with them about the wonders of God.  I don't think it was a coincidence that I woke up early that morning, that I sat down to journal at that exact time, and that I looked outside my window to see this grand picture that had been painted for me from my God.  This picture will be forever captured in my mind of how he provides light for us to walk through our world.  It was another miracle God sent into my world through my kitchen window to show me how he is working in my life each day.

As I sit here today, I find my desk overwhelmed with papers that need to be scanned and shredded.  Wouldn't it be wonderful to be able to shred our problems we come across each day? 

I have learned since April 2009 to handle problems or concerns with a greater ability and to turn them over to God.  I never thought about it until today that you are actually shredding your problems, concerns, worries when you turn them over to God. 

When you actually shred the paper it no longer is one piece...it is turned into many pieces that you aren't going to be able to put back together unless you spend a lot of time and effort.  So when you give that problem over to God....in your mind shred that problem and don't spend your precious time trying to tape the pieces back together again.  Life is too short and too precious to spend time trying to take back what you have turned over to God or to the shredder. 

If you are a visual person...maybe it will take you writing the problem, concern, worry, etc down on paper and then asking God to help you while you watch the paper being torn to little pieces.  If you don't have a shredder, maybe you could tear the paper up into a many small pieces as you can and then put it in the garbage.  Either way, the point is to give it to God and then be still and listen for his answer.  Ask for his guidance and he will give you people, thoughts, the sky, the water, words from others, etc. to help you.   He will put in place what you need to do when you ask him for help and give the problem, concern or issue to him.

Have a wonderful day....