Once I took care of that situation with my mothers death my father was constantly calling me. I finally changed my number. It was such a messy time in our lives. Well since all of that 7 years have passed and I'm remarried to the most wonderful person. He's never raised his voice to me and has treated me with respect and I'm now learning what a healthy relationship should be like. My children are thriving and love their stepfather. He is such a wonderful role model for them. Through all of this it was so difficult to keep a job and stay focused. I'm staying home for a bit with my children this summer but find the quiet to be so deafening. I'm trying to make friends but I still can't trust anyone but my husband and children. I wish I could let my guard down and just live without the emotional baggage I have. I've been in therapy for years but this is who I am and I have to accept myself. I've lived through so many heartbreaks and just have to find a way to allow myself to be happy. I hope this helps someone out there even though I haven't figured everything out yet. I'm still a work in progress. My only hope is to remain healthy and be a great person to my family. I think today has been a tough day but I know it's just one day out of many great days and it will pass. This is the interesting thing about depression just know it can get better with medication and therapy and sometimes you just have a bad day. I'm sure tomorrow will be better. Take care, everyone!